Murder at the lodge

Murder at the Lodge

Author’s Note: I complain about the cold in winter,  and I hate the oppressive heat of summer – but I am grateful for writing to pass the time when going outside is just not that pleasant. I humbly submit July’s edition of  ‘Nathan Burgoine’s 2018 monthly flash fiction challenge,‘ featuring a dam as this month’s location, the object is a typewriter, and the genre is a mystery – all in 1000 words. Thanks for reading and enjoy this story with “Canada Day” slightly in mind.

Bernard Beaver packed mud atop his lodge in the middle of his pond. Before calling it quits for the day, he swam out to inspect his dam. Proud of his work, his attention quickly redirected to a fissure forming in the heart of the structure. Bernard panicked, for he noted that his prized possession, formerly embedded in the wall – a 1940s Smith-Corona typewriter – his  “keystone-signature piece” – was missing causing water to flow through. Bernard found it in the woods while felling trees, and thought it a nice cosmetic touch for his project. Angered by its disappearance, he decided to return tomorrow to repair the hole, and went back home under the dawn sky.

He emerged in the lodge’s wet room, where, while drying off, he heard Beatrice Beaver, in the family room talking. “So nice of you to come over Maurice. I always appreciate your company while Bernard’s out.”

Maurice Muskrat, replied, “I love coming here, you make the best tea!”

“You’d better skedaddle. I don’t want Bernard to see you. You know how he gets.”  The last time Maurice dropped in unannounced, Bernard practically knocked out all his teeth with a swing of his heavy tail.

Bernard exploded hearing Maurice’s voice. Wet or not, he didn’t care, and bolted into his family room.

“What the hell is he doing here!” He screamed at Beatrice, “He spends more time in my lodge than I do! It feels like every time I go out, I see this rodent in my home with my wife!”

“There, there, Bernard,” Maurice replied, “I’m only here for Beatrice’s awesome tea – by far, the best in the Wetlands.  You know, ever since the spring floods washed away my home, the Missus and kiddies went to live with mother-in-law, or who I call, ‘Nutcracker’.  If you knew her, you’d understand why I come over here so often. Besides tea, you guys always have the best food around!” Maurice saw a nice green bit of moss hanging on the wall and ravenously munched it. He rubbed his stomach, and guzzled his tea.

Bernard scowled, “Have you finished your new home yet?”

“No, haven’t started. I figured the kids and wife are happy, and if I only have to stay at Nutcracker’s to sleep, I don’t have to interact with her.” Maurice checked the time, “Sunrise. gotta go to bed.  The fam thinks I am working,” he gave Beatrice a surreptitious wink, but Bernard caught it.

He lunged his wet body across the floor, grabbed and wildly punched Maurice.  Maurice escaped his grasp, quickly got up, and said, “Well, Mrs. Beaver, as always, loved your company!  Best be off now,” and dashed to the wet room and the Beavers heard a splash signaling his exit.

“So help me, Beatrice, that is the last we will see of Maurice!” Bernard stormed to bed.


Beatrice woke up that afternoon, alone. Wondering where her husband went, she exited the lodge and scanned the dam, expecting to see Bernard working away. She saw two new fissures, that concerned her, but no site of him.

The dusk sunlight reflected off something metallic on the shoreline with some Wetlanders surrounding it. Curious, she swam to them to discover, in shock, Maurice lay dead with head bludgeoned by the typewriter, now placed over his crushed skull. Beatrice gasped, and started to cry.

Woodsy Owl, placed a wing around her shoulder. “So sorry that you had to see this Beatrice. I know Maurice was a good friend. Hey! Back off the crime scene. I, too, am a bit peckish, but we have to finish the investigation.” A guilty looking coyote held Muskrat’s leg in his mouth, but obediently dropped it and backed off. The crowd comprised a weeping Manny Muskrat, a large crane, a few raccoons, the coyote, and a badger.

Woodsy proclaimed, “Manny tells me Maurice spent most of his time in your lodge, which didn’t please Bernard. Bernard has disappeared. Did he go off to work?” Beatrice could not answer.


Two days passed before Bernard returned. The Wetland gang still puzzled over who smooshed Maurice.

“Where’ve you been?” Woodsy asked.

Bernard looked over Maurice and yelled in shock, “That’s the typewriter that someone stole from my dam! No wonder there are leaks!”

“Answer the question.”

“I heard rushing water coming through my dam, from the hole opened by someone stealing the typewriter. I clogged it up, but heard more water. I dug around and discovered some human installed a ‘Castor Master’ hidden in my construction!  Humans, always try to ruin my hard work and revert water levels. I tried to stuff their corrugated pipe, but got stuck in it. I just freed myself. Can I have my typewriter back? This is war! I suspect the humans will poke a new hole in my dam tomorrow. The typewriter should easily fix that.”

“But if you’re stuck in the pipe, who killed Maurice?” asked a raccoon.

“Who cares!” replied Bernard, “Maurice probably bugged a human by poking his nose around where it shouldn’t, like he did my wife. Humans took MY typewriter to flood our precious pond, but I’ll save our habitat!” Bernard boasted.

The creatures nodded and echoed “Bloody humans,” in agreement.

Woodsy, not so convinced, asked, “Do you have proof you were stuck in a pipe for two days?”

“No, but I can show it and my work to you,” Bernard said, taken aback by Woodsy’s accusatory tone.

“I’m afraid I‘m going to have to place you under Wetlands arrest, for murder.”

Manny sobbed and screeched, “It wasn’t the humans, nor Bernard. it was me!! That bastard slept with everything with four legs, and hated my mother. He’s lazy and deserved what he got.”

Everyone around echoed their agreement.

“Can I now have my typewriter back?” asked Bernard.

“Yes, yes,” replied Woodsy, “Grab it and let’s leave Maurice to rot in peace.”

“No need,” the coyote answered, and with one bite, picked up Maurice’s remains and walked happily off into the woods..

Murder at the Lodge © 2018 Bruce Gordon. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without permission except in the case of brief quotations in critical articles and reviews. For more information, contact Bruce Gordon.

dissbruceBruce Gordon lives in the ‘burbs of Ottawa with his author wifey, three basses (hers, but she lends him one), five guitars (totally his), and one drumkit (hers and hers alone). A musician since his teens, he still plays, but has also ventured down the writing path. His upcoming novel, Dissatisfied Me, A Love Story, is about a 49 year old on the verge of his 50th birthday, who reminisces about his life while sitting alone in his room in his mother’s basement.

The Junkyard Brownie

The Junkyard Brownie

At the urging of wifey, I’ve decided to participate in author ‘Nathan Burgoine’s 2018 monthly flash fiction challenge.

Author’s Note: Brownies are commonly known as wonderful chocolaty-cake treats we all love and enjoy. In context of this story, the brownie, as found in Scottish folklore, is a friendly elf. I first got exposed to brownies reading Enid Blyton’s Mr. Pinkwhistle stories as a child. This flash fiction is themed on fantasy, hot chocolate, and junkyards. Sorta like the chocolate-based elf and the drink connection. Thanks for reading and enjoy.

Soaring over the kingdom of Poonow, a majestic dragon dashed through the skies. George loved how the early sun reflected off his coppery wings. He surveyed the tiny homes as the villagers stopped their routines to admire him as he zoomed overhead.

The dragon spotted the eight foot high wall of tires, found at the outskirts.  He zoned in on a giant red X near the centre of the enclosure and descended. As a rather large dragon, the ground shook violently when he landed, and the yard, filled with tons of metallic junk ranging from vehicles to appliances, clanked and chimed summoning his arrival.

He towered over a hut near the landing pad.  A dark brown creek about a foot wide flowed from the front door, and three gnomes holding mugs were sipping a beverage and, based on the tone of their voices, sounded upset. They did not break their conversation, despite George’s thunderous arrival. Unphased, two goblins appeared passed out cuddled in a ceramic bathtub, surrounded by toasters and car parts.

“How can Ich do this to us?” the gnome in a green hat complained. “This hot chocolate he serves just does not make busting our asses hauling all the metal we find to this dump worth it anymore.”

The second gnome, dressed all in yellow answered, “It could be worse,” he bent over and filled his cup with the creek’s brown liquid and took a sip. He immediately spat it out, “Blech, I stand corrected, this does not taste like chocolate anymore, but something a bit more familiar. I can’t quite place my finger on it. Hey, where are Forlan, Rasbis, and Tanin? I have not seen them around here in ages?”

The third gnome, who had a rather large white beard and red hat replied, “You have not heard? Our despot ogre king, Ronald Tumpkin, declared them illegal immigrants in the land, and they were exiled. He feared that their metal collecting took away employment from the goblins who supported him – lazy bastards,” he glared over to the goblins snoring away. “Tumpkin claims we gnomes are responsible for all the crime in the kingdom.” The other gnomes muttered in agreement as they gagged on their drinks.

George, growing impatient at being ignored roared, which immediately got everyone’s attention. “I want my hot chocolate!”  One of the gnomes nervously offered his, but dropped the cup when he realized it was too small to satisfy the dragon’s craving.

“Ich,” he cried to the hut, “George is here. Can you please come and serve him some hot chocolate?”

A rather large brownie bolted through the door, holding a mug about the size of one of the gnomes. He placed it in the creek until it filled with the brown liquid. He offered it to George who blew a flame over it to apply more heat. and took a quick swig. He regurgitated it up immediately. “God, that tastes like shit!” George roared, “what did you do to make this? Dip two dirty socks in hot water?” He angrily threw the mug on a pile of metallic junk, that clanged and clung as it fell to the ground. “Never mind, where is our daily tribute?”

Ich nervously pointed to a pile of six rusty car mufflers. “What?” the dragon bellowed, “this is getting worse and worse! The counsel is losing patience.  You know better than anyone, Ich, that we demand the finest metal in the world! And we need twenty pounds a day per our agreement.”

George belonged to a counsel of six dragons, who long discovered the ability to turn basic metal into gold.  They seized any opportunity to expand their growing hoard, stored deep in the mountains beneath their chambers. After the last great war that devastated the kingdom, the villagers happily provided the dragons with fresh metal each day for protection. Ich, owner of the junkyard, had the responsibility of procuring the daily tribute for the dragons. The kingdom lived in subsequent peace for centuries.

The brownie, not wanting to upset George further, said nervously, “Have you not heard that King Ronald believes that by putting heavy tariffs on foreign metals, the Kingdom of Poonow would prosper and all his goblins would  gainfully be employed? Those bastards produce nothing! Remember, that great ore we gave you in the past was not native to our territory!”

“This is most disturbing,” said George, “and threatens our ancient agreement. This king must be removed! Where is he now?” He closed his eyes momentarily and opened them.

Ich replied, “In the White,” he paused as five other dragons magically teleported into his scrap yard, “Castle.”

The largest, Elrick, stood a head taller than George, and had beautiful platinum scales. He said, “Is it true, Ich, that Tumpkin’s responsible for our tribute being cheapened?” He paused and saw the creek, “Hey? Is that hot chocolate?” He lowered his head and lapped a sample. Immediately he spat it out, “That’s fucking vile!”

Ich replied, “Our king wants us to produce our own cocoa and has taxed those imports too. These goblins don’t farm either so I use sewage now.”

Enraged, Elrick breathed fire on one of the sleeping goblins, waking the other who immediately bolted for a large pile of radiators to hide. “Counsel, we must leave and destroy the White Castle, and Tumpkin immediately. Ich, you are now be in charge. Undue the tariffs and bring us back the best possible metal. And for Pete’s sake, get us some decent hot chocolate.” The dragons nodded in agreement.

It did not take them long to destroy Tumpkin and his tower. Ich’s scrap yard soon gathered the finest metal bits again that kept the counsel happy, and the world at peace.

The hot chocolate creek soon flowed with the richest tasting cocoa, and the deported gnomes returned to their former work, satisfied to be rewarded with the fine beverage.

All was well in Poonow. King Ich and the dragons prospered.

The Junkyard Brownie © 2018 Bruce Gordon. All rights reserved. No part of this work may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without permission except in the case of brief quotations in critical articles and reviews. For more information, contact Bruce Gordon.

dissbruceBruce Gordon lives in the ‘burbs of Ottawa with his author wifey, three basses (hers, but she lends him one), five guitars (totally his), and one drumkit (hers and hers alone). A musician since his teens, he still plays, but has also ventured down the writing path. His upcoming novel, Dissatisfied Me, A Love Story, is about a 49 year old on the verge of his 50th birthday, who reminisces about his life while sitting alone in his room in his mother’s basement.

100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Day 1 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Great to kick off this year’s dissatisfaction on the first day of Lent. I don’t practice this tradition, but wifey does. Typically, the Tuesday before lent, for tradition’s sake, we eat pancakes. Last night, we ran out or milk, so we had pizza instead. Hard to put maple syrop on pizza.

Today, Wifey announced that she is giving up all sorts of snacks for Lent. This includes, but not limited to, cup cakes, junk food, chips, basically all the stuff I like. I am now, by default, practicing Lent by association. I can now easily kill 40 days of my 100, but I am pretty sure I will find other things to complain about.



Day 2 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Too many people criticise public servants.

If you ever doubt public servants work hard, just look at my colleague’s desk. He is so busy, he has to eat lunch out of a can‎ – doubt it is heated. This is also an indication of his salary, can’t even afford to buy Tupperware.




Day 3 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I don’t drive my car to work too often, but today I did. Usually, you grab your ticket on the way in, and pay the guy in the booth on the way out.  Seems in my parking lot, the new owners want to replace the attendant with a machine, not too dissimilar from the one pictured below. Problem is that the instructions in the machine were backwards.  Instead of inserting and pulling out your ticket in the machine, you have to leave it in. The picture of the credit card was also upside down with the stripe facing the wrong way!!  This is nuts! Took a half hour to get out of the garage by the time it was my turn.  I had to call the attendant, but he did not speak too clearly over the intercom.  Finally got out, but took several tries! If the payment centre was in the building, maybe would be a bit more productive??


Day 4 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

It is minus brrrrr degrees outside. Wifey and I decided to go for a lunch at Jack Aster’s in the Centrum Mall of Kanata. Seemed like half of Kanata had the same idea. Mall was packed, and lineup outside of the restaurant (it was 1:3o! Who eats lunch at 1:30?)

We got in and asked for a place for 2. There were three two seated booths that were empty (despite the place being really busy).  We were asked to wait. Fifteen minutes later, we were finally escorted to one of the three empty booths.  The location of these booths were about 15 feet from the door, which allowed for an arctic cold blast every time it was opened. We had to eat lunch with our hats on….


Day 5 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

HMV is closing its doors. Gone are the days where you look through a rack of CDs or albums to decide what music you want to buy. In fact, with all these streaming services, one can argue gone are the days you buy music. Sad that this industry has become so devalued. Even our listening habits have changed, no longer actively listening to songs, rather have them on as background.

That said, for HMVs clearance sale, it seemed that all they had available was Justin Beiber and Christmas albums, and at modest discounts.  Maybe there is another reason why this chain went under (note, for what its worth, they did not have Nickleback, that would have sealed their fate a decade ago!


Day 6 0f 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Shot day…the clinic was open! Allelujah! The nurse who administered my shot is quite nice and originally from Bosnia.  She does have an accent when she speaks.  As I sat and waited to be called in to have my shot administered, I heard what I thought was my name. Came out as “Brrrrrooooose” by the nurse. Heavy accenting and extension on the rrrrrr and the uuuu and sharp cutoff on the ce.

That wasn’t so bad, but because of it, I had a flashback to when I had a Czechoslovakian nanny. She said my name in a similar manner, except that she threw in an “ie” at the end. Made me shudder being reminded of that. Further, my nanny sometimes dropped the “r” to say “Boosie”. Reason to this day I only permit a select couple of people to call me Brucie, in case any of you were interested.

Day 7 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Finally home from work and settling down, and zonked. Ever have one of those days, after having very little sleep, that you cannot process anything?  Today was such a day.  Had a first. Went to get a sandwich at our local restaurant in the building. Saw a delicious picture of an egg, bacon, lettuce, tomato, and cheese club and started staring at it. The photo sandwich must have had a hypnotic effect, because two people passed ahead of me in line. Then I heard “sir” in a voice that seemed like a dream. I kept hearing it a couple more times (it was coming from behind the counter), then I snapped out of it, as if I came out of a deep sleep. The people who passed me in line started to laugh.

I proceeded to order a smoke meat sandwich.

Day 8 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Was walking up to the bus stop and waited in line.  As I was about to board the bus, saw a Blackberry 10 in its case on the ground at the bus door. I picked it up and when I got on the bus announced that I found this Blackberry.  Was very surprised that someone actually admitted to losing it.  I would have been happy to have  it “dissappear”.

Day 9 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Driving a friend home from work and listening to some tunes.  I think my ear has officially died today. I heard a song I never heard, but  for some reason, I thought Cat Stevens sounded like Tina Turner.

Day 10 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Felt like watching a great Kubrick film, Paths of Glory, which was available at the Ottawa Public Library. I went online and placed a hold on it, and it became available for me to pick up today.  Been a while since I checked something out, but the automatic checkout machines do make the process easier. I scanned my card, scanned the DVD, and poof, I was permitted to walk out of the libray with the borrowed itesm.

Felt badly for the librarians. Who do they talk to during the day, now that patrons no longer have to interact with them.

Day 11 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Why can’t we spring forward early Friday afternoon to save our weekends? For that matter, why do we need this at all. I had my lunch at 2, and dinner time is coming fast. I am not hungry

Why don’t we move the clocks back a half hour in fall, call it even, and never do this time changing nonsense again


Day 12 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I go to a gym, I don’t get offended by the presence of my scale. I get more offended by people who :

– sneeze hork or do other bodily functions which the shower is not intended for
– though I get its form of communication, Neanderthal ape laced with profanity not an official language
– not wiping up after using equipment
– eating copious amounts of garlic or curry just prior to working out
– unsupervised children at the gym
– noise cancelling headphones making anyone in the above list difficult to communicate with
– being forced to listen to nonstop auto tune rap for an hour a day
– axe spray in the locker room

Well done Carleton. You would save more money and promote less offensive environment by taking down your gym’s mirrors


Day 13 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I heard the recording console for Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon recording console is going to be auctioned off at the end of the month.  Should be a fair bit of coin. By contrast, I wonder what I would get for mine?



Day 14 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I saw a yummy caramel apple gluten free granola bar on sale in the grocery store. Five bars per box.

I bought them, and when I opened the box saw this.  The bars were about the size of my pinky. The image on the right shows five bars in the box.

Day 15 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017
Having a last name as a first name is a problem. I am often called by my last name. Often, way too often. It is a running joke in the office as this is a daily irritant. What is particularly frustrating is my email is always signed BRUCE Gordon. Today was an all time low when a student I was interviewing called me Gordon.
Day 16 0f 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition
I was at the gym this afternoon after work, and as I was running on the treadmill, I saw an add for Goodlife Virtual Fitness classes. I did not think too much about it, then when I got off the treadmill, I saw footprints glued to the ground like the photo below. It is hard to read what is on the footy-print, but it said “this way to the Virtual Fitness Class”. The footprints lead to the door where the REAL fitness class is. The lights were bright, and I was tentative to go in thinking I may get drawn into some cyber-vortex. Found out that virtual fitness class gives you the opportunity to pop a dvd in a tv set and workout in the gym…good way to for the gym to save money by replacing staff with a function that one can do in the comfort of their own home – instead of forking out $100 for the honour of doing exercise in front of a TV with others.

Day 17 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

As a teen, I heard that the average person waits in line SEVEN years of their lives. That was very easy to believe back then. Nice that some of that time is now reduced thanks to modern technology and online shipping and banking. But if you ever get nostalgic, or actually want to increase the amount of years you spend in line, go to the post office. For me, it is a guaranteed 15 minute wait each time a go, even when their is no one in line (when there is no lineup, the clerk is off doing other things). Today took the cake, and this is typical of my post office experience. I have one letter to send. The gentleman in front of me had 22 parcels (I counted). Each one of various sizes and dimensions going all over the place. He had an over 200$ bill. Wait time was about crazy, about 3 minutes per parcel. I was luck he was down to his last 6. The two people ahead of me each had one letter – about 1 minute wait for each one of them.
PS – my experiences with drug stores is a little better, though there is always someone in front of me who either does not have adequate health care information or has 100 questions for the pharmacist

Day 18 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I am all for accessibility and helping those in need. I don’t like it when people use disabled parking spots who do no have stickers permitting to do so and seem healthy.  Even if they have the permit, I sometimes find I have to remind myself not to judge those who use disabled parking spots who have no apparent disability.

As I struggle with judging others, what do I do about this? I see a gentleman walking to the front of the line at a bus stop. He has a white cane and a service dog by his self (dog was a beautiful black lab with blue booties). He was also wearing earphones.

Day 19 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

 I get my wife the latest version of the iPhone. Guess what? All I hear is Angry Birds.
Day 20 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

ALL HAIL ERGO-TRON! It arrived! It is awesome and majestic. I can stand and type!

Now if only I could get my keyboard replaced….

Day 21 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition
Had to pick up some milk and bananas. Wifey accompanied me to the store. Always nice to have Wifey with me. When we got the store, she proclaimed “we need red pepper”, we get the pepper. “We need onion”, we get the onion, “we need potatoes”, we get the potatoes, “we need dill”, and so on.
Got home, realised we did not get the milk and bananas!

Day 22 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

On bus. Looked down. What the heck is that?

Day 23 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017

Spent a really nice day with Mum in Montreal. We had a brunch in our usual place, Ben & Florentines, a nice breakfast restaurant.  The picture below is the “after” shot. Note remnant of egg. The before looked like a plateful of scrambled eggs, bacon bits, sausage bits, and spuds all over the floor….the reason?

I am all for families going out to having a nice meal together in restaurants. I like babies too (especially with a bit of ketchup and mustard). This table had a family of three.  The mother, place a rather large pile of food in front of the baby, with no plate, no placemat, RIGHT ON THE TABLE!  Who knows what germs were there (another sub-issue).  She did not give her baby any instruction to eat.  Baby was smart. As the food was not served with silverware, it took all the food, picked it up, and threw it all over the place.

Parents waited until the pile of food was gone, a process that took a couple of minutes. Paid their bill. Then left.

Day 24 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition (for yesterday)
On my way home from Montreal stopped to take a break at McDonalds in Casselman. Been a while since I have gone into one. I saw this ambulance outside of it. Was concerned that this was a new McDonalds initiative to be proactive about responding to the effects of their food on clients. Ended up the med techs were just going for a Big Mac and bypassing the drive through.
Day 25 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition
I recently got an iPhone 5 to play around with. I am enjoying the integration of the phone with all my apple products. I have been a Google Music person the last few years, and I figured since Apple products blend really well together, I’d try the Apple Music streaming service. Initially, I was frustrated, as it would not allow me to download songs to my phone for 90 days (some sort problem of too many Apple IDs with the phone). The 90 days are now over and I can now do offline listening, and I do like how Apple Music integrates nicely into iTunes.
As I mentioned in the past, a geeky thing I do is track my music listening habits. I have been doing this for years and you can see what songs I listen to at\
The tool I use to make this happen is called a “scrobbler”. It installs on my Mac and when I sync my music with iTunes, it updates my stats on the site.
Tonight was the first time I scrobbled Apple Music. The scrobbler reported that it could not update my site as the songs I listened today were dated WAY TOO FAR INTO THE FUTURE.
I think Apple Missed the mark of trying to predict my listening habits…I also do not plan to relisten to their suggested songs from Vixen’s greatest hits for a long while (they really only have one).

Day 26 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I watch the news in the morning, and get bombed with the same commercials over and over again.

Today’s “hit” commercial is promoting the Real Housewives of Toronto (another reason to be dissatisfied). The quote that got me during the commercial was “the higher the heels, the closer you are to God”.

I am of the opinion that that is a very weak theological point as most religions require you to take off your shoes to walk on “holy ground”

Interesting to note, Mark 6:9 says “Wear sandals but not an extra shirt.” I guess I wont be close to God today as I have an undershirt on.

Day 27 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Wifey FB post from events of tonight

Bruce: *says rude joke*
Me: *tries not to laugh but fails*
Me: You are truly the worst of all men!
Bruce: No, I’m the best of all men!
Me: No, you’re absolutely the worst of all men.
Bruce: You married me because I’m the best and the worst of all men.
Me: That’s absolutely accurate!

Me (alone typing this): She was suppose to disagree!

Day 28 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Saw this little critter hanging around my driveway this evening. A sure sign of spring; but seeing it brought out some melancholy in me. I was reminded of our first bunny that hung around our house. It spent much of his time sleeping in our backyard and eating clover. We called him Angus McMunchin. Sadly, Angus became a late night snack for a coyote who kindly left all but a rabbit’s foot entwined on a hip bone on our deck (coyote also left some things behind to try to claim the deck as his…). It was a sad day.

Bunnies are cute. Coyotes can be too. The two together are not.

To cheer things up after such a sad post here is a joke: What to you get when you cross a bunny with a leaf blower? A HARE DRYER. ba ha ha

Day 29 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition
I go to the gym well before sunrise. If you are a jogger in suburbia:
1. There are no streetlights
2. There are no sidewalks
3. Don’t think you are visible by wearing all black with a flashing red armband.
This is what I saw while driving…does not give me fuzzy feeling for runners safety, or overall intelligence

Day 30 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction- 2017 Edition

A few years ago, I saw a product to help with digestion . They were cookies called Bowel Buddies.

Then I saw this product. My reaction was the same as the title of this cereal when I saw the price and questioned where is the money going?. There has to be a cheaper way to promote regularity.

Day 31 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

No offence to all my friends who are horticulturistically inclined, but our local Stupidstore is starting to fence up one-third of its parking lot for its garden centre. The writing was on the wall this week when big pallets of huge bags of earth and fertiliser appeared out of nowhere. Can’t they see that there is still snow on the ground? Obviously, there is a lot of money to be made if the grocery store is converting much-needed parking space into a flower shop. The denizen of Suburgatory do love their flowers and making their homes to a certain standard – one which everyone is expected to live up to.

For me, I buy a bed of flowers in early spring, they die during the first frost in June (happens every year). Buy another one, either the animals eat it or it dies two months later in the fall.
I am going back to my Scottish roots and am growing peat moss in my yard. Cheaper and better for the grass. At least it can be turned into scotch. Can’t really drink or eat flowers.

Day 32 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition (for yesterday)

Iiiiiiiiits Wrestlemania! Some cool things from the show…a wedding proposal (real), and the unexpected (and likely) loss and retirement of the last standing Wrestler that was around during the times when I followed this sport as a teen (late 80s to early 90s) – the Undertaker, RIP

Then the evening was scarred by the presence and performance of Pitbull. Guy is everywhere, songs “featuring” Pitbull, now Wrestling? I am not even sure what he is talented at, certainly not singing and writing music….is using autotune a skill?

Day 33 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Rain sucks, and sucks more when you ride the bus. I sat down by the door in a window seat. I was minding my own business until I noticed my pant leg was getting wet. I looked up to see someone had sit down next to me and hung their umbrella on a rail in front of the door, effectively making the umbrella drip all over my leg. Being wet makes for unhappies!

Day 34 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Had a Starbucks spinach and feta wrap. Are wraps suppose to be crunchy?

Day 35 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

So the Couche-Tard in my building was having a customer appreciation day. They were giving out free coffee. Their coffee is really decent. It normally is 1.35 for a cup, and each cup uses freshly ground coffee beans, blended by the machine as the coffee is brewed in front of you. There was no one in the store getting free coffee. Where were they? At the Tim Horton’s access the hall, waiting in line for 20 minutes for the coffee that costs $2.00 a pop and can taste like two dirty socks dipped in hot water with the fragrant aroma of cat urine.

I don’t mind Tim Horton’s, but the little guy just can’t cut a break. Guess they don’t have many customers to appreciate….

Day 36 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edtion

Somehow missed this day…

Day 37 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I am all for supporting small businesses. My heart breaks when I see the small guy trying to make a living get crunched by a big corporation. I usually pay with Visa, mostly for convenience and point collecting. When a small business requests we pay with cash, I will honour that as I know they have to pay surcharge and lose a bit on the profit (which for small business, does have impact).

Walmart, however, today announced it will no longer accept Visa, purely as a financial decision – despite Visa giving them the lowest possible rates. Visa is the largest credit card in Canada, and not everyone can pay with cash all the time.

When this comes in to effect after July 18, I plan to continue shopping at Walmart, ensuring my cart is filled with hundreds of “dollar store” valued items from different sections of the store, and when asked to pay cash, say, sorry, cant do it, and leave my cart at the cashier.

Any joiners?

Day 38 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Took wifey for a blood test this morning, saw this little creature crawling along the wall in the clinic. Hate to see what else may get into the blood samples. Concerned for overall cleanliness of our medical facilities.

Day 39 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

These bunnies were walking around the floor today. Instead of giving out chocolate eggs, they were taking money for the HOPE of winning a chocolate egg!! Even the Easter Bunny is running into hard times! lol

Kidding aside, our Social Committee does awesome work to bring cheer to the workplace, and they are amazing! Always appreciate their efforts and creativity.

Day 40 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

This bunny I saw in the grocery store tonight is :

1. Confused as it wants real vegetables
2. Sad because there is no carrot juice, but only V8 type stuff and canned tomato paste.
3. Wondering why there is no vodka sold on this shelf
4. Feels lonely and abandoned…

Day 41 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition
I met a few of you at fun startup called Netactive about 17 years ago. Some of you may have still seen me wear the jacket to this day. It still fits, still keeps me warm, and does not smell too bad.

Today, someone tapped my shoulder in the store and said “I HAVE to get a picture of that jacket”. Do you mind? He immediately said that he was a tester for the company. He got paid 15$ an hour to test video games. Great deal! He almost made as much as I did (I was the guy developing those games…)

He was very nice, and I am always one to do a photo-op, but made me reflect that the jacket is a walking billboard of a cool idea that failed. Perhaps I should get the name reembroidered to “Not Active”. Would be more apropos, but then people would just think I am lazy and relatively inert

Day 42 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

GORGEOUS DAY! Warm, sunny, perfect for a walk with wifey.
But, in the distance, came a thunderous racket of 3 chopper like motorcycles, all the bikers wore “Ruffians” as patches on their leather (at first glance, I thought it said “Muffins”, which may have been appropriate given their statuesque physique….heck with a name like Muffins, they can get sponsors from such suburban tropes like Starbucks). When I saw this, I thought it was bad enough that suburban teens (mostly bored males) want to protray themselves as people who have tough lives in the projects. Now we have grown men (perhaps mid-life), who are bored and want to be the second coming of the Hells Angels in my subdivision!

Follow up note. These guys are a legit club. And of all things, they are Masons (but deny they are Masons) on bikes! I thought they were long gone!

Day 43 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction- 2017 Edition

Mum got a thank you gift from Ultramar for being a loyal customer (she heats her home with their gas). It is a $20 gift card which is to be used at Ultramar gas stations when you fill up your car with gas. As there are no Ultramar stations near her, she kindly gave me the card.

Then we read the fine print. The card is for a 2$ discount for 10 trips to the gas station, minimum purchase 25 litres of gas. So you effectively get a discount of 20$when you purchase about $350 worth of gas. Twenty bucks is twenty bucks, but does not seem like much of a thank you!

Day 44 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Easter is here, and though I get the importance of the season to some, the choice on TV of watching the documentary Finding Jesus on CNN or the Habs beat the Rangers in playoff hockey was pretty easy.

Despite that, on this day, I am reminded of a quote. “The greatest single cause of atheism in the world today is Christians: who acknowledge Jesus with their lips, walk out the door, and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable.” I can’t say if that is completely true, but it surely does not help, especially when one sees what is going on in the world around us.

Peace to you all on this day where I reflect on self-sacrificing love, which seems miles away from what some of our political, religious, and media-based institutions portray.

BTW: I did NOT get a chocolate Easter bunny this year, in case you were wondering.

Day 45 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

New ways for waiters/waitresses to fish for tips…leave jokes on the receipt. Luckily for her, the tip was not based on the quality of the joke as I groaned more than I Iaughed. Kudos for the effort, I would have given no tip if the joke had been like “What comes at the end of Easter? An R” or “Who is the Easter Bunny’s favorite actor? Rabbit DeNiro” or “What’s yellow, has long ears, and hangs in trees? The Easter Bun-na-na”

Day 46 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Not to undermine the seriousness of this story, but shouldn’t this police composite drawing be a Têtes a claques character? I mean, what next, stick figure drawings?


Day 47 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Rock n Roll Hall of Fame pretty cool place if you like looking at original artists guitars, clothing, lyric sheets , etc. It also had a huge exhibit dedicate to John Cougar Mellencamp (charts songs like I do!) U2 in 3D reminded me of what a special live band they are.

Absent was Rush…except on a Tshirt that lists all the inductees for $40

Day 48 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction- 2017 Edition

I am all for teaching children new life skills. Today, I was the tenth person in line at Starbucks, and the line not moving. There was a man with three young boys at the cash. He was showing them how to make a purchase with a credit card, by inserting the card in the device and entering his pin. Not bad except he was giving them each a try at it to buy their own drinks, and the six year old in the troop struggled with it for a long time…I hope people waiting in line equally learned something too.

Day 49 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction- 2017 Edition

First night in my hotel, and wow, lots of channels to watch, but no TV guide. Channel surfing almost impossible as each channel has about 10 minutes of commercials each. So I stayed on 1 channel and realized that this was not quite new programming. Lol, did not realize this show was still a thing

Day 50 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction- 2017 Edition

United Airlines announced their flight to Houston delayed due to a fuel leak. They have to drain the aircraft of fuel. Patch the leak, then refuel, all in about 30 minutes . The person announcing this sounded hesitant, perhaps the recent backlash makes delivering bad news especially difficult

Would you board this airplane, even if you are being compensated for potentially missing a connecting flight in Houston?

FYI I am on Air Canada, but was served by a united attendant who was very friendly. Ironically, Air Canada staff could learn from this

Day 51 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Went for a walk, and this three way intersection in Kanata is what we call the Three Gates of Hell…No one knows how to stop, turn, or go straight at this intersection, which means pedestrians are at high risk and will have low probability of success crossing the street. Walked down to the roundabout where it was safer to cross.

Day 52 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

As always, waiting for my doctor’s appointment. I was 10 minutes late and there are still 2 people ahead of me. Two children really acting up with high pitched screaming and everything. Parents threatening to take children home for bad behavior. Parents – Does threatening your children with not seeing the doctor help improve their behavior?

Day 53 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Donald Trump says Canada has ‘outsmarted our politicians for many years’ on lumber trade. Canada’s trade team strategizes next move.

Day 54 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Starbucks has a fun promotion. Buy coffee, and they give you a chance to play a game with a Canadian theme to try to win Starbucks for life, along with thousands of other prizes. I did not realise this was happening until I had an email notification saying I had 59 plays! I log into the site , and had a choice of games. All the same. You choose one of the three objects. And if it’s a winner , you win. I chose the canoe race. I chose number 2 10 times, never won. Number 3 always won. Chose 3, 2 won. The odds were not one in three. I won nothing after using all my game plays

Day 55 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I am starting to see a plethora of sticky notes and messages appearing all over the house. I know it takes a while for me to register new habits, and my memory not as sharp as it once was, but I am seeing these all over the place…mine is an addendum to an instruction for unscrewing a pipe under the sink

Day 56 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

there was a time when 50 grams of chocolate was just a nickel. Now you buy chocolate bars for 20$! Would you buy?


Day 57 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction- 2017 Edition

Thanks Facebook for wasting 10 years of my life today. The little outputs are well documented in this video montage

Day 58 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Yes changed my calendar a couple of days late, and yes, I am an undergraduate fan of Iron Maiden. But the view from this photo each morning is not my happy way to start the day

Day 59 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition (as I am sure I missed one somewhere)

Today’s bus ride home brought to you by the new Ottawa forced fellowship program, designed to pack as many introverts in a confined space as possible. I now know people in ways I could never have possibly imagined. Program designed to force people to stop using cellphones (no space to hold) and to literally feel connected together

It worked, I hurt, and I no longer want to take the bus

Day 60 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Got bemused when I saw a promotion for Diamond & Diamond lawyers that took the entire side of a bus.

Their motto: “Why suffer alone” with a photo of a man leering ‎sort of made me wonder, is suffering alone worse than suffering (and paying) for lawyers? Are lawyers really our best friends? And what about the phone number? Hurt? Yes, your pocket book if you call them.

Day 61 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Speaking of bus adds (yesterday) , just saw one for Comicon promoting Adam West and Brent Spiner, both canceled, and sadly advertising money spent . : (

Day 62 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition (for yesterday)

Someone thinking that I would remember this technology left this on my desk. Note the “attractive” price for mid-1990s computing could buy you a half of a new car at that time.

Day 63 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition (today)

Went out for a drive, and it is incredible to witness how the river is flooding everywhere. We have had so much rain over the last couple of weeks. We went to eat at Mongolian Village, and they serve us two fortune cookies. I opened both to get the exact some fortune as below….

Note: As of this posting, it is still raining

Day 64 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Squirrels are sort of an unofficial mascot for our team at work, so when I saw this post, was naturally intrigued. Flying Squirrel. Interesting name for a company. Then I saw the video and reflected a bit on it.

Love to see how this works with 2000 kids in here at once…going nuts and trying to emulate some of this stuff. Hope the squirrel has insurance…

Day 65 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Took 20 minutes to drive to hospital, took 25 minutes to find parking

Day 66 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

So glad to have tuned in to see the last goal of the game

The way the Sens are playing, I may need to eventually by my first team jersey #HabsFor2020StanleyCup

Day 67 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition (for yesterday)

This was sort of an interesting photo, and not 100% sure what it is trying to tell me…do I get $300 if I park there with a disabled sticker on my car, or no parking for the disabled, or if I have a permit, I have to pay $300?

Day 68 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

A colleague offered me a part time share of his parking lot in Gatineau last week. The price made it very tempting for me to pick up on the deal, especially of late, as I have been taking the car more often to work. Today’s commute sealed the deal. I left home at 730 to arrive at the office at 915. I will not take my car to work any more than I have to . The bus is a guarantee 1 hour and I can read and listen to music

I will never complain about OC Transpo again (will see how long that promise lasts)

Day 69 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition.
Spent the day learning the fine art of being a school crossing guard. The job is much more nuanced than I thought, otherwise people think that you are too aggressive, like me, so it seems, in my yelling at people to get off the road. ; )

They really do not pay those guys nearly enough! lol

Day 70 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Day 2 of my comicon volunteer duties…I was manning the lines outside of room B. The schedule said that all of the celebrities were doing Q&A session in my room, but really they were in the main hall. I wish I had a dollar for every time I was asked the question if so and so was in my room, and I said no they are in the main hall #1.

Most common response back…”but it says HERE (points to schedule) that this is in room B” (almost as if I was lying or hearing this for the first ime). Better yet, the response of where is Main Hall 1? And I would point down the corridor and say, do you see the #1 sign? That is main hall 1.

Actually had a lot of fun…enjoyed doing that

Day 71 to 72 0f 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Day 73 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition (for yesterday)
Comicon is now over. 42000 people stampeded through the halls of the EY centre. As they were getting autographs, listening to celebrities talk, getting photo ops, and shopping, I was standing in the rain.
The irony – I had a lot of fun on the outside looking in, and met some really great people and will look forward to the next time I do something like this (maybe from the inside in Montreal???)

Day 74 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I meant to post this shortly after my return from Cleveland. It has been a while since I last flew, and I thought it funny that Apple had a vending machine. Now all the major electronic stores have them. You can buy a $500 Boss headset in one of these machines. Have to admit, not really the first think I think about while flying.

But in the Ottawa airport, they sell BAGGAGE! I would hope people would actually buy luggage and pack before going to the airport!!

Day 75 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Any car radio experts in the house??

My car is less than 5 years old. I love listening to music, keeps me sane when I drive during rush hour or on any trips longer than 10 minutes.

My Toyota car radio Aux/CD button stopped working completely yesterday, so anything plugged into the deck won’t play. The button only turns on the CD if there is one in there.

Cant drive with what is played on the radio, so need my tunes! Is this a quick fix or do I need to replace the deck? If so where do I do this (car radio stores seem to be a thing of the past…)

btw: who designs a deck like this? The radio buttons are cut into the dashboard! How on earth do you elegantly replace the original radio? Most decks are rectangular!


Day 76 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

How on earth does a hubcap just disappear from one’s car? They don’t evaporate, do they?

Day 77 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

What is the point of showering when the buses don’t turn on the air conditioning?

 Day 78 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

A friend once described my job as the Purple Monkey Dishwasher expert. The expression was born out of the Simpson’s episode in the video below. How does it translate to me? I am often communicating in the middle. Developer comes to me and says there is a problem. I prepare documentation to pass to another team that prepares another document to be dispatched to a central agency. That agency sometimes does not know which team to dispatch the document, it goes back to the team that originally prepared that submitting document, they don’t know the answer and comes to me. I answer, then the process is repeated, except this time the dispatcher prepares a few additional documents for different teams. Each team has similar yet different questions, so the documents retrace the steps back to me at different times for answer. I answer the same question several times. Goes back around and this time the documents arrive at the people making the fixes to the problem. They don’t know how, so it comes back to me. I dont know the answer so I ask the developer who gives me the instructions how to fix the problem (he could not do it, the others have to), so I send the revised instructions back through the pipe to get the job done.

5 minute fix takes two weeks. Today was the end of such process.

Day 79 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition (for yesterday)

Spent over an hour trying to get across the Île aux Tourtes Bridge in Montreal. The bridge was built in 1966, and seems to always need construction. This is typical of Montreal.

Irony, there was only 1 lane that was closed, and the traffic backed for over 5 km

Day 80 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I was concerned about my return ride from Montreal, based on yesterday. And the Île aux Tourtes Bridge had the same lane reductions, but I flew across. Have no idea what was different between the two trips.

I looked up online that Montreal decided to do all its construction during the long holiday weekend, perfect for any tourist who may want to take a quick trip to the city, or travellers going to the cottage for the first time of the season.

Day 81 of 💯 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Watched a recent Iron Maiden show filmed in Dublin. Singer Bruce Dickinson said at one point “blithering idiots, now running the world, with their fingers on the nuclear button”, and when he points to flags showing where fans have come from, there are people from as far afield as Japan and Argentina. “We don’t care where you come from or what you do in your spare time. If you come to an Iron Maiden show, you’re family.”

Who would have thought that in such crazy times a grizzly old rock band in bullet belts singing about demons, warfare, apocalypse and mass murder would emerge as a beacon of unity, peace, love and understanding? God (or the other fella) bless them.

Day 82 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Went to work despite feeling ill, only to have, on the way home, a truck take out the power lines at the entrance for the OCTranspo Transitway, causing havoc for most commuters…and later, I decide to go to the walk in clinic to see a doctor only to find out the clinics were closing an hour early (read between the lines, Senators hockey pre-empts health care)

Went home and sucked on a throat lozenge

Day 83 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Software for the lighting system was really wonky. The lights were going on and off all over the building randomly. I had a meeting in a dark meeting room, and I flipped the light switch to turn on the lights, and then the emergency alarm went off!

I felt sheepish, but it was a perfectly timed coincidence with a planned evacuation drill (I am talking the evacuating the building, not evacuating people).

Day 84 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

With all the fuss about the Sens not selling out playoff games, I am seeing a lot of prime seats that are empty in Pittsburgh..FOR A GAME 7!

Day 85 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Ever sit in on a teleconference when you have laryngitis, say something profound, and there is a big empty pause cause no one has a clue what you are saying? That was my day…

Day 86 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition
Laryngitis continues but did try to get some fresh air on this glorious day. Figured I would mow the lawn, as that was what all the denizen were doing, and figured they would be too engaged in their yard work to want to talk to each other. Wifey, though, sees someone on the street and starts to talk with them. I am forty feet away gassing up the mower and she yells at me a question related to their conversation…she looked momentarily puzzled when I did not reply…

Day 87 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

New Conservative Leader, Andrew Sheer, chooses a fiddle cover of “We Are the Champions” as a victory song …find that ironic if you know anything about Freddie Mercury and Andrew Sheer’s values.

btw: also found this ironic…and I don’t even know the man yet! Are my Twitter posts really THAT offensive to a new Conservative leader ; )

Day 88 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Seems to be missing….

Day 89 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

So excited to get my Hydro bill. I believe this is the first time I am getting a Hydro rebate, courtesy of the Wynne government! I wonder which of my friend’s grandchildren will make up the difference in payment?

Day 90 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Colleagues thought I was suffering from laryngitis still today. I thought I was talking in my natural speaking voice…

Day 91 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

This city has serious commuter issues. Buses are expensive and overcrowded. Not many people carpool. People do not know how to drive or are very patient drivers. And parking costs you 15$ if you just step into the parking lot.

Telework is becoming an option. We are already not talking to each other because we are glued, face first to our devices. We will talk less to each other if we don’t go into the office!

Day 92 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Going to my first gig in a long long time tonight (Brass Monkey at 10 pm). I thought that what I wore at work was appropriate (black golf shirt and cream pants) Wifey said no

So jeans and Iron Maiden t-shirt are now on

Day 93 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I won’t make a political commentary about US withdrawing from Paris accord. I won’t, in fact, make any generalizations about the notion of how the right looks inward and self, and the left look outward to others. What I will say is this:

Clean coal is like dry water…

Day 94 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Driving home from the gig last night, recalled playing in band 15 years ago. After each show, we would go and have a fast food feast at a hamburger joint. I had that itch last night for fast food and it came out of the blue. I had not thought about that tradition. Yet It was so installed in me, I scratched that itch and went to McDonald’s.

The experience was not what I remembered 15 years ago. And as my body is older, my experiences today relate more to evacuation than satisfaction (if you do the understand what I am saying, look up what it means to evacuate a person, as opposed to a building)

Day 95 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction -2017 Edition

Classic parking. Suppose to go between the lines! And parking on the median probably not a bright idea just outside the beer store! Perception is everything!

Silver lining, did not take two parking spots for his precious car, like most jerks do

Day 96 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Since when does eating out for a breakfast cost as much, or more as a lunch? I always got that drinks and appetizers have incredibly huge markups, but isn’t anything sacred anymore. Too much for me! Going to sulk as I munch on some Rice Krispies.

Day 97 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Last Wednesday, I saw this on my neighbours driveway. It took me a while to figure it out, but it seems like a failed experiment to build an aircraft from a BBQ and a dryer (dryer in front).

Note: garbage collection was not on Friday past, but this coming Friday, so I have had a full 10 days to appreciate this fine creation

Day 98 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I am getting tired of paying huge cable bills each month. I really only watch one channel, the one I call stupid (CNN), for about 15 minutes a day as the panelists on it who yell at each other usually help wake me up and motivate me to turn off the TV and go to work.  I am bemused by the CRTC less than 25$/month cable legislation. If I were to go with that option, I get maybe 10 functional channels which contain nothing but rubbish and commercials, and if I want to subscribe to the stupid channel, that would cost me 7$ a month! If I want more stupid channels (like Fox News, CNBC), I could get them all bundled for 10! No sports at the 25$ level. If I want Sports Net and TSN, I would have to pay 18$/month extra, which puts me in my current tier. Cable boxes are extra!  I am thinking cable will shortly be gone in my near future…

Day 99 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

I am all for bilingual signs, it is a way I have always improved my French vocabulary. in fact, it is mandatory in my office. Saw this sign hanging in the bathroom today. I may be wrong, but it seems like the French instructions are a little different than the English, and seems to be missing a vital step…

Day 100 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2017 Edition

Well, year three has come and gone, and despite my posts, there was a lot of cool things going down in my life. I volunteered at Comicon, I am having a lot of fun with a great work band (and great bandmates!). This spring has brought about a certain life renewal, despite feeling sick since daylight savings time. I have reconnected with some old friends, and am trying to relearn how to make new ones (yes, it is a forgotten art).

My posts, have to admit, are a bit like American TV…stretched way beyond their shelf life. So need a new and creative way to use Facebook as a communication tool. Maybe in a month I will start posting my next 100 Day series, like Day 1 of 100 Days of Trump; or Day 1 of 100 Days of Kitty pictures.

And yet, with all these tools for communication at our disposal, it sometimes feels like we communicate less, in a weird way. I have oodles of friends on Facebook, of which 10% are pretty active (and always enjoy chatting with them). But I have noted a decline in use since the American election. I guess people are just getting fed up and dissatisfied of arguing or reading posts about how great is the “other side” and how horrific is your side. Despite that, thanks for sticking it through folks, and thanks all for reading. Hope it was deeply satisfying.

If you want to read the previous 2 years posts, or listen to a few of my 100 days of guitar riffs, visit my site. I may get back into blogging my frustrations again in the near future.

I do plan to post this year’s 100 Days of Dissatisfaction soon. Will let you know when it goes online.


How to Win Friends and Influence People – on Facebook

I am the king of Facebook friends!  I have a whopping 154! Down from over 250 five years ago! I am THE poster child for Facebook popularity. My general rule of thumb on Facebook is that if we have met and get along, you can join the Bruce Gordon dissatisfaction show. If we have not met, follow me on Twitter. It is a simple rule I follow, and this rule evolved over time as I refined my definition of what is a Facebook friend.  I have contacts on Facebook, btw, that have thousands of friends, and I wonder how many beers have they drunk with one of them over the year.

Truth be told, the title of Dale Carnegie’s book, that I unscrupulously stole, is something that is very difficult to do in our current social media world. In fact, his adage, “If You Want to Gather Honey, Don’t Kick Over the Beehive”, could apply to Facebook, but I get the feeling, in some cases, that the beehive has not only been kicked over, it has been pummelled, punched, sat on, and lit on fire.  Not much honey to be had.  Pity.

Where moms use to say “if you have nothing nice to say, do not say it”, social media encourages freedom of speech, even if it is not sensitive. It seems that self-control in our social interactions has been replaced with anger talk, or people taking up the flag of certain social and political positions.  There is a sense of entitlement to speak one’s mind. Social media is moving more and more away from a friendship tool and becoming a tool for activism, debate, and hate speech. It is also becoming a news source, which is proving unreliable and biased.

The end result, what social media promised to be a fun way to reconnect with old friends, is now creating deeper divides as we forget more and more how we interact in person with people. Should Facebook be more a reflection of our offline interactions?

And I am the as guilty as anyone in terms of expressing my thoughts too freely.  It starts innocently with posts that solicit a laugh, specifically, the “Too Much Information” posts. Humour around bodily functions, sexual parts or activity, or the noise one makes when they eat a boiled egg, is actually the start down a slippery slope.  Some of us remember that we were instructed never to talk about “sex, religion, and politics” in mixed company. Sometimes we drop those barriers when we are in trusted company. Social Media is always mixed company, unless you invest a lot of time in controlling who sees what.

Ever unfriended someone in real life?  How about on Facebook? How are they different? If you have been unfriended, how does that feel? Facebook unfriending can be surprising, unexpected, and offers no solid reason. In my case, it is easy to understand and guess why.  Here are the top reasons why I lost many Facebook friends:

  1. Natural distance. They were people  I did not know well to begin with, and we did not have any social media interaction.
  2. Leaving a community – where the people do not engage socially with others outside of the context of the community
  3. By association. Divorce couples unfriend common friends. If my spouse or close friend unfriends a mutual friend, then by association  I may get unfriended.
  4. My posts offend someone and they do not want to bother discussing them
  5. Politics.

Politics, lately, has been the main source of division.  There are no longer debates over political ideologies. Rather, they are put-downs of people who have belief in the other side.  Last provincial election, the Liberals should have been voted out of office, there was a lot of corruption (still is). The amount of conservative propaganda that was bombing my timeline was unreal!  I did not mind the propaganda that hilited the Liberal corruptions. What I did mind were the insults hurled not only at the corrupt Liberal party, but also Liberal supporters. “Lib-tard” became a fashionable, and offensive expression.  There are others. I posted my Liberal propaganda, not because I wanted to influence a vote. I was just being obnoxious. Result – lost some conservative friends.

Now comes the Trump world. More than any in recent memory, this past US election has had a spiritual impact sent rippling through society and impacting people’s lives. This simply isn’t like a victory of Republicans over the Democrats, or vice-versa. Let’s be clear again about what happened. The Americans elected as its president a person who aroused evil fears of racial bigotry to gain political power, who blamed and demonized vulnerable immigrants, who displayed the most vulgar behaviors toward women, who expressed wholesale mistrust toward Muslims, who tried to criminalize his opponent, who attacked the functioning of the free press, who dismissed threats to the planet’s sustainability, who promised to wall America off from outsiders, and who pledged to protect the economic security of the nation’s most wealthy, even while shielding his own wealth from public accountability by not disclosing taxes. This, not to mention, suspicions of collusion with Russia.

I am now seeing, in Canada, conservatives posting more hate speech than ever. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t mind good political satire, especially when warranted. What I despise are people who show little respect for others, even in a heated political forum. Debate your point with respect, not by insulting or promoting fear.  I have not unfriended often, but I have when people posted something that hateful or promote values that may be hateful or hurtful to someone.  Vocal association with Trump risks that.  This is really challenging for people I know who tend to be right-wing. They have no choice as their political values are now tightly linked to a man who is promoting hatred and evil.

If I were a conservative, I would be crying.  I always pitied the US for having such poor choice of candidates for this past election. Since his election, have you noticed that Trump is arousing the emotions negatively of our content EVERY DAY!  That does not unite. That divides. All we see on the news, (and I won’t get into the fake news commentary), is Trump. There is no escape from this person who promotes hatred more than I have ever seen. The only way I escape it is by shutting everything off and reading a good non-political book.

Fake news or real. It does not matter. Damage is being done.

I have no problem accepting people with different political ideologies as me. I actually can learn and grow from differences of opinion and I think that is healthy. I enjoyed the debate between Ted Cruz and Bernie Sanders on health care in the US. It was clear which side of the fence they stood on, and they presented their case and rebuttals well. It was a reasonably intelligent discussion, from which one can make a choice of ideology. These discussions CAN happen.

I am challenged by this Trump phenomena and dealing with those who ally with Trump ideology.  Trump has not shown any good so far. In fact, he has shown nothing but evil, and I am seeing that type of approach entering Canada, which concerns me.

Can relationships on Facebook even be a possibility with all this activism? I think so if we learn to behave,  but I think culturally we are not going in that direction.  The more we promote evil by associating with Trump openly and the further we are promoting fear and hatred in Facebook commentary, the more we divide ourselves and lose sight of any good.

I believe there is a spiritual need for mankind to connect with one another and build relationships. It is a shame that politics has now created a space of deep rooted anger and hatred, only enhanced from a social media perspective. Walls are being built as people with identical ideologies are coming together, and anything different remains on the outside. There is little choice for some. It may be the only way to keep social media stress free. Sad case. In a world where we are overly scheduled, tools like Facebook sometimes remind us we are not alone.

I am always looking to make real connections with people. I use Facebook as a tool to do that. Facebook helps, but in person connections are more meaningful as memories are built together. Relationships can be fostered on Facebook to encourage the bridge to in person contact. Just got to apply the in person rules we had been given in the pre-facebook world.


100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

After 100 days of being dissatisfied last year, I am starting off a 2016 edition, so if you unfollow me, please be sure to re-follow in September.

Day 1 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Got a promotion YAY! Got my first pay check, and according to our new Phoenix system (all you public servants know what this is..and it has been in the news), I got demoted, BOO!

Day 2 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Wifey made my FAVORITE cupcakes (lemon). I was looking forward to the four left for me when I left for work today. When I go home, there were just two.


Day 3 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

So, I was craving poutine for some reason today.

I went out to discover the place closest to my office serving poutine just closed down. Bit of a shame, it was a Portuguese restaurant, and it had great spicy fries and chicken. The next closest place that sells poutine is a Greek restaurant. Another option is a nearby Italian one. A third is a Lebanese one. I work in Gatineau. Do you think there would be French Canadian one, like La Belle Province, near my office???

Day 4 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

In my hometown of TMR (Montreal) today, saw a real cool BMW M6. I do not know much about BMWs, but I do know a 100K+ car when I see one. I pulled alongside it, and saw a teenage boy texting in it while running through a stop sign turning left.

Question, if you owned a car like that, would you let your teen drive it? Also, if you have that kind of money, why not buy your son his own car to wreck, and maybe in the Volkswagon family?


Day 4 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Why on earth on Mother’s Day is Axl Rose the top trend on Facebook? Ya, I get he performed for the first time with ACDC, but at the very least FB, trend something that a mother would be proud of!!!


Day 5 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

You all know about my passion for grocery shopping, these young ladies in the distance wearing white paper hats and blue shirts were really making a lot of noise, disturbing my peaceful bliss.

I quickly understood what all the excitement was about. The man on the left was a butcher talking about the fine art of butchery. I felt sad for the future of these young girls if this is exciting for them.


Day 6 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition.

I like interesting and unique beers and how they are packaged. But having Tom Green on any label would kill anyone’s desire to live, let alone the desire to slake one’s thirst with a pint of ale.


Day 7 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition.

Woke up at 145 this morning, so went to the gym early. That is OK, going to the gym early is a good thing. But gentlemen, two things. Bowel movements should be done at home before leaving and not for the locker room. Also, showers are not the place to blow your nose and hork. The gym is a public facility, not a kennel.

Day 8 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

About to embark on a three day weekend! Could not ask for a better spring day today! Weekend weather forecast? Rain!

Day 9 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Getting the house ready for painting next week, and forgot how many cool LPs we had hidden away in a bureau! Lots of Rush, Beatles, Floyd! Really cool and maybe worth something now that they are coming back in vogue…then I went through the pile to discover some “hidden treasures”. What the ….???

Day 10 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Ever been at a Comicon with the hoards of people swarming around to buy trinkets and shirts from many fun TV programs? I never felt so confused in my life! I did not get why so many people want to spend a lot of money to stand in line all day (and Ottawans do odd things!)…and yet I left with some pretty fun memories!

Day 11 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Quiet Sunday morning reflecting a bit about what I saw at Comicon yesterday. One of the hilites was to sit in on a Q&A session with Billy Dee Williams. He defined “cool” in the 70s and 80s. That was where my memories were of him. When I saw him come on stage as an 80 year old, heavier, and slowed by age, sobering reality of time flying in life kicked in. He was great, btw, but clearly had the effects of age and lack of recall (could not remember his own web site, On an additional note, the other panelists I saw, John De Lancie (68), Rene Auberjonois (75…though he always looked 75), and john rhys-davies, who I will see today (72) have also aged. Life does go by fast, but the Cons do give these actors something to do in retirement.


Day 12 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

The say socks disappear mysteriously. Well not only socks disappear for me, but I have been plagued by my rebellious slippers who decide to walk away from me and hide all the time! They only started doing this to me a couple of months ago….and today, I cannot find them at all!

Day 13 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition
I am a huge Tarantino fan. I have not yet seen the Hateful Eight and am hoping to take it out from the library. Our library is really good. You can normally place a hold on an item on the internet, and when it becomes available, you get notified and you can pick it up. Unfortunately, for this movie there are no holds available. Basically it is first come first server. I saw as I was leaving my home to do an errand that it was available at the library, so I zoomed to try to pick it up, only to find out it was taken out three minutes prior to my arrival!!


Day 14 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction -2016 Edition
Grateful to Rogers for forcing me to learn a new way to count to five and simplifying their on demand service


Day 15 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Found this…LCC classmates should remember these IDs. All I have to say is Really? #tbt

Day 16 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Spring is in the air!! And, like 90% of Ottawa, I decided to take the day off to get a head start on everyone in the garden. Very grateful to Home Hardware that they had an express checkout!


Day 17 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

In the early 90s, Jurassic Park was one if the scariest (and fun) movies I saw up to that time. Tonight I saw Jurassic World. Meh…Barney is more interesting


Day 18 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Love how stores dumb things down for the consumer. I never once have seen a “Mr. Prickly” attack my grass, nor see the need to do anything to ward off a sock puppet attack on my lawn.


Day 19 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

One sure fire sign of spring, cars start to migrate from the driveways to the streets. Makes for better pedestrian experience and gives kids options to play on the driveway/streets instead of the park which is unused and is just around the block.


Day 20 of 200 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016

I have always liked Pink Floyd, but embarrassed to admit that I have never listened to anything they had written prior to their album Meddle.

I listened to the first four and stopped after Ummagumma, and have to say, this is not the Pink Floyd I knew and was quite confused. Ummagumma allowed each band member to write one song each, which is a cool idea. David Gilmour said of his song that he just “bullsh**ted his way through it”, and it sounds like it, then you get Roger Waters’ contribution. Glad to say that drugs had nothing to do with the recording of this song:

Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving with a Pict (but it blended well with the denizen of the suburbs!)

Day 21 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Turned on Netflix and saw that someone hacked my account…

Day 22 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

After hearing a bunch of yappy children, was relieved to find that the perfect clubhouse was on sale at the Home Hardware. Comes with exterior padlock.


Day 23 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Solicitors and canvassers who ring my doorbell when I am trying to unwind at the end of a long day is a nuisance, especially when I have a sign that clearly says no solicitors. I wonder if a more explicit sign is in order.


Day 24 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Went to the gym twice today. First time, this morning, when I left I said goodbye to the girl behind the counter, she said ‘have a nice day’ in a dismissive way with fake smike and resumed her discussion with her friends, which is in line with @goodlife policy as most of their staff are like that. This afternoon, I walked in and said hello to a different girl behind the desk. Instead of saying hello back, she said abruptly “we close in an hour”. After my workout I weighed myself. And I gained a pound. I love fitness!!

Day 25 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Lawn mowing seems a lot faster than it used to. Either I am getting faster and better, or I simply don’t care. The fact that the grass is brown and I can’t tell what is cut or not does not help.


Day 26 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Heard this morning that a remake of Roots starts to air tonight on A&E. I was too young to appreciate the original, but knew it had a huge buzz and am interested in the story. I tried to program my PVR, and thanks to some unknown technical issue, it took nearly a half hour to program all 4 episodes. Did not realize that Roger’s PVRs required a reboot after setting each episode. Nice feature.

Day 27 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Do not click on unknown YouTube links sent by mischievous friends first thing in the morning. Can cause ill effects for your whole day

Day 28 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Looking to do competitive bike racing? Look no further!!

The city of Gatineau ran their annual “Grand Prix Cycliste Gatineau” road race today starting at 5 pm. Perfectly timed to promote the sport during a Thursday rush hour, so all the public servants who are going to and from home can stare at the bikers for half hour while they sit on their buses (which cannot move because the police are blocking the streets).


Day 29 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

So, I watched American Horror Story Season 2 – Asylum a few weeks ago (and the asylum was run by nuns). It was pretty intense, but what is freaking me out the most is not the horror, but the song (Dominique nic nic) that was played throughout the series for the patients. WORLD’S WORST EAR WORM EVER!!! When I think it is out my system, I would have to meet with an “Anik” or “Dominic” Nic Nic. I am going Nic Nic crazy! I caught my self singing Nic NIc in the office on a few occasions, and when I did, a French colleague (from France), almost dropped dead. She said, “Do you realize what you are singing”, I said “No”. She explained it to me. In France, “nic” is the equivalent of a very crass word for fornicate. Who knew a song sung by nuns could be so crass.


Day 30 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

If I was not already disillusioned with religion, watching 3 preliminary UFC fights tonight did not help. Two victors gave “glory to God”. Maybe I am ignorant, but I did not realize that Jesus blesses some folk to kick the crap out of people, or I don’t understand how giving someone a concussion would be honouring to a loving God…


Day 31 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I am increasingly amazed that whenever I see a show, there will always be 1 or 2 British actors on them that seem to be anywhere, like Jim Broadbent. Well, Jim was not on Game of Thrones tonight (or ever, but there are still two seasons), but tonight, I saw Percy from the Black Adder. It did not have the same “zing” without the Lord Flashheart

Day 32 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 edition

Based on the anchors, looks like a news show for children. And announced one day after canceling Canada AM. Can’t imagine Ben as a news personality. Partially cause he has none. As always, well done Bell! The “Your Morning” team…



Day 33 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Worked through lunch to leave work earlier today. Left work early, but busses schedule determined by a spin of a wheel. Got home later than normal


Day 34 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

As always, OCTranspo continues to improve ways to confuse ridership. Bus fares will be the same for everyone, and getting around town will be obfuscated by “colour” choices. I will have to come up with rhymes like “if the bus lines are blue, the suburbs are for you”.

My future ride will likely change from bus – bus to bus-bus-train-bus! Yay. Visions for a future over 3-hour commute!


Day 35 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Ever have those days where you look for a bit of peace and sanctuary after work? I was sort of hoping to get that on my way home. I cranked the first Iron Maiden album almost full blast to go to my happy place. Listened to the first few bars of the first song, then the music was replaced by woman talking very loudly on a cell phone ALL THE WAY HOME. Peace ruined. Now sulking in the basement


Day 36 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I had to stand up on the bus today. Everyone who was sitting around me seemed completely oblivious as they stared fixated at their zombie-making cellular devices. I try to ignore this daily ritual, but could not help but notice a sharply dressed man (in a suit) in his late 50s texting “I will be home soon muffin”….awe, very cute. When I got off a bus, a young teenaged girl ran to a young teenaged boy saying “HEY F#@$face”, and proceeded to give him a hug. Times have changed.

Day 37 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I am all for supporting small businesses. My heart breaks when I see the small guy trying to make a living get crunched by a big corporation. I usually pay with Visa, mostly for convenience and point collecting. When a small business requests we pay with cash, I will honour that as I know they have to pay surcharge and lose a bit on the profit (which for small business, does have impact).

Walmart, however, today announced it will no longer accept Visa, purely as a financial decision – despite Visa giving them the lowest possible rates. Visa is the largest credit card in Canada, and not everyone can pay with cash all the time.

When this comes in to effect after July 18, I plan to continue shopping at Walmart, ensuring my cart is filled with hundreds of “dollar store” valued items from different sections of the store, and when asked to pay cash, say, sorry, cant do it, and leave my cart at the cashier.

Any joiners?

Walmart to stop accepting Visa cards in Canada

Day 38 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

We have a new voyeur in the neighbourhood, who lives across the road (we also have BBQ family who sit and stare at our home all summer in our backyard). We call him “Sir Woofsalot”. Every time I step out of the house, I see him spying on us through the window (do a close up of the image, he is to the right)….then he starts to bark non stop. He is a cute dog, but wow, he complains a lot

Day 39 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Bus service randomly skipping buses this day. Took 1.5 hours to get to my doctor’s office from work, only to find out that the nurse “forgot” to tell me last week that my weekly shots have been changed to every two weeks. Also asked if I could come earlier than normal next week…

Day 40 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I am all for smart use of guns. Military and police officers need them. Hunting. Farmers, etc. In the USA, I can list off many mass killings, but I am struggling to remember one being averted by a responsible, law abiding, gun-owning citizen. The answer is simple.USA should give guns to all its citizens in order to change that.

Day 41 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Dropped off my car at the dealership for servicing. I proceeded to walk away to hit the gym. Few blocks down, out of the corner of my eye I saw a technician whizzing around in my car like he’s going for a joyride and zooms right by me, then speeds around a corner. Then I got the bill later…

Day 42 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I really like children, especially with a bit of ketchup and mustard. I am amazed how one small toddler requires 2 to 3 seats on a crowded bus. I am even more amazed that we have such strict laws for car seats for older children, and nothing equivalent for buses where kids stand on seats, do pirouette, and jump on a bus that is normally very difficult to safely stand on for adults

Day 43 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition (for yesterday)

I am not an aggressive driver, but I don’t like being slowed down and will cruise the left lane on highways to pass people or to go to point A to point B faster.

If you own a Vespa, NEVER ride the left lane on any highway or roadway, you will always get in the way. Vespa claims these bikes can go up to 59 MPH, but no sane person would ride them that fast, and frankly, 40 KMH likely their top speed in optimal conditions. I don’t get their appeal…you never see James Bond riding a Vespa.

To the Vespa driver who cruised the 417 in the left lane yesterday, THANK YOU for ensuring the safety of your fellow commuters by slowing traffic down to a crawl.

Day 44 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition (again for yesterday)

I said this before, I collect President’s Choice points. Each week, I get an email promoting the special offers telling me which foods I can buy to get points for.

If you get a lot of points, you get free groceries. Simple.. The offers, though, are typically received a day after I buy huge quantities of those products, making the offer useless to me as the offer expires each week.

Yesterday, I finally got an offer I can use – for peanut butter. I went to the store and they were sold out. At this rate, I will have enough points to claim a 20$ discount by the time I retire.

Day 45 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Tornado warning in Kanata…but we live in Narnia, where we get a bit of lightning, lots of sunshine, and no rain

Day 46 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I appreciate working dogs. While waiting for a bus, listening to my tunes, a seeing eye dog brushed by my leg accompanied by a blind man with a white cane. The man did not seem to realize that his dog came in contact with me, and he smiled as he continued to walk to the front of the bus line. I noticed as he walked by that he was wearing wireless bluetooth headphones.

My first thought, isn’t that dangerous for a blind man to remove his ability to hear around him?

Day 47 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Had an offsite 3 hour marathon meeting this afternoon, and, because I was in meetings all morning, I did not have a single cup of coffee, so I got one during a break in the afternoon.

Ever get confronted with a snack in the cafeteria that you remember having as a kid, then suddenly, out of a burst of nostalgia, you start to crave it. Today, it was Fig Newtons, and I bought a pack of 4. The first bite took me to a state of nostalgic bliss. The second made me think, “Who eats this crap”?

Day 48 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Working in a Linux shop the last few years has given me a solid appreciation for the operating system. Buying a Mac a couple of years ago gave me an appreciation for a nice, simple to use, a family computer that is a great user experience.

Not being an uber Mac user, doing a simple task of finding files embedded in the OS and copying them to a flash drive is not too straightforward. Windows allows me to drag and drop files from one Window to another

What do I do? On my mac, I open a terminal session and use Linux commands to do what would have taken me less time in Windows.

Day 49 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

BestBuy sends out emails for specials they are offering. Today announced the arrival of a product I actually have been waiting for a long time. Wireless Bose noise cancelling headphones.

Bose noise cancelling headphones really are superior technology, and if anyone has ever taken a ride on OCTranspo would know, you cannot hear your music with Apple ear buds, even when cranked full blast. In fact, while you are unable to hear your songs, because of the volume, the passenger sitting next to you gets to enjoy the music exactly the way you do, that of digital gobbledygook. Misery loves company!

My criticism with Bose noise canceling headphones is the cost and the 10 feet of cord they give you with it. Cord management is a challenge on a crowded bus. Today, finally, BestBuy announce Bose WIRELESS noise canceling headphones. AND on special! I have been waiting for this! I am stoked!


Great “special”. No way. I would lose them in a week, or they’d be stolen. Back to listening to gibberish

Bose Quietcomfort QC35 Headphones Overview – Best Buy Canada

Day 50 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Due to some wackiness of Facebook, I think I discovered why I am talking to the air! I wasn’t posting to my “friends”, it seems that I was posting to a very small subset (like 15) people. Who knows how long this has been going on for!

What is odd is that no one seemed to notice!

Day 51 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

CFL kicked off for Ottawa last night. It was one of those “games of a century” featuring a Redblacks 55 yard field goal to tie the game on the last play of the fourth quarter, and featured new Redblacks QB, Trevor Harris, who completed a 71 yard bomb in his first pass of the game and was near perfect while leading team to victory in OT (if you saw Harris’ stats last year with Toronto, you wonder why he is not starting).

I forgot the game was on and was watching YouTube videos of cats before going to bed.

Day 52 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Thank you OCTranspo for giving me a tour of Western Kanata, though I did not really see anything new as I have lived here for 17 years and I reside (and you were suppose to go to) SOUTHERN Kanata

Day 53 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

That moment when you think “retail therapy” is joining the dollar shave club

Day 54 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Very upset about the Subban for Weber deal. One of the worst deals the Habs have ever made (and they have made a lot, and yes, Weber is talented).

Very upset that the Oilers traded Taylor Hall in an incredibly one-sided deal. I know they need a defenceman, but that is a huge price.

Proof again why pro hockey franchises do not do well in Canada.

Why the P.K. Subban trade may be the worst in Canadiens history

Day 55 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Skateboarding is cool. Lots of cool stunts you can do. If you skateboard, please don’t do it on a busy sidewalk that is laced with pedestrians – especially if you are in your forties. You may run into a few people, and you end up moving slower than the walkers.

Day 56 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 edition

It is 8am, isn’t it a little early to have the music cranking for Canada Day? The only event listed in my neighbourhood at this time is a senior’s breakfast at the nearby retirement home. I did not realize they like to shovel pancakes in their mouths with the cadence of a bass drum at a steady 120 beats per minute.

Day 57 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I see big headlines for the NHL free agency frenzy. Over 600 million dollars paid for 100 players. Sounds like a bargain (not)! Especially as there are no Gretzky’s or Lemieux’s in this mix.

I don’t get it. Ottawa did not get any free agent deals, and Edmonton got rid of one of their young talents. Montreal is rolling the dice on a Russian player who has had attitude problems (the “reason” for dumping their star Subban). Seems like a lot of teams are spending too much money, or bringing players through a revolving door, and are not really doing anything to improve their situations.

NHL will continue to be boring.

Day 58 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

There is a bit of running gag in my family that I cannot complete reading any Edward Rutherfurd book. I have started Sarum three times, but never completed it. It is not that I did not like the book (what I read was really good!), but it just seemed to take me too long to get through that I put it down and forgot about it.I am determined to finish reading at some point in my lifetime, and this morning was looking at the cost for this older book on Kobo (and Amazon). Seems like the eBook version is more expensive than the paperback version!! It seems this is common for a lot of books!!How is this possible? e-books are cheaper to produce and have a wider reach than paper-based equivalents? Guess will have to go “old school” on this one!Footnote and coincidentally: Looks like I was reflecting on another ebook issue a few years ago!

Day 59 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Survived Canada Day! Yay! But it seems like everyone at the office has spontaneously evaporated! Where on earth is everyone, and why am I not there???

Day 60 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

This is a good one. I went to the doctor to follow up on some regular blood work this morning. He asked how were things, and I mentioned my ears were itchy. He poked around my ear and saw there was a wax blockage, so he suggested we remove the blockage via his magical water syringe. I have had this done before, and was hoping to get relief. Left ear done. No problem. Right ear a fight. Now my ear is totally blocked and I can’t hear out of it. Have to go back to do more syringe work on Friday.

Day 61 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

For Star Trek’s 50th anniversary, Netflix is showing all Star Trek series for first time on Netflix Canada. Be nice to see some of the ones I have missed. That must mean nearly 600 hours of TV to watch. What are the odds I will watch all before Netflix takes them off the air?


Day 62 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction 2016 Edition

Ever get to that stage in the office where the microwaves get so dirty that no one dares even goes into the kitchen? Ours did, and a brave soul posted some signs to express displeasure (yack)



Day 63 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

That moment you crave ribs from a special restaurant that you enjoy going to for lunch…and you arrive to discover that they have new summer hours and do not open until dinner. Then you realize your only restaurant option is vegetarian…

Day 64 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

New rule: If you are going to pay be credit card at the grocery store, do not cash in your PC points. Credit card will fail.

Day 65 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

It started with one, then two, now dozens of miniature condoms litter my desk. Who knew they reproduced!


Day 66 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Twitter is my social media platform of choice. I use a Blackberry. The Twitter app for Blackberry has not been upgraded in three years! What is frustrating is that I like to express my dissatisfaction by retweeting a story and make a snide remark.

Twitter for the Blackberry does not let me do that. For that matter, it does not tell me when other people retweet and comment on my tweets.

Come on Blackberry! Get in the NOW! (Don’t get me started on the Facebook app!)

Day 67 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

New neighbour moves in in May. Rogers technician connected our home to theirs in order for them to have internet access. Nice having an above ground cable wire connecting the homes that can double as a skipping rope. They came back to properly feed the wire underground to their house.

Now I no longer have internet or telephone in our home. Oddly enough, cable works.

Day 68 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I have been pledging myself to go the gym daily when I get up first thing in the morning for over a year and half now. At what point should I just give up? I have never been a morning person, never will. Can’t even do the gym late at night, my only other option. (I am now able to go once or twice on weekdays).

Day 69 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Does anyone know what planet Youppi is from? Or what species or sex it is? Hard to believe this is a Montreal icon and Youppi gets free entrance to Habs and Expos games. I guess as it was the original Expos mascot, youppi may have been the offspring of “La Grande Orange” ( Expos great Rusty Staub). Not sure if Rusty was that furry. Only “logical” conclusion I can think of.


Day 70 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Freaking Pokemon!! got run over by a Pokemoner in the stairwell at work…then someone else found one in my office

Day 71 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I applaud this person’s effort remind fellow parking lot users to be sure to park between the lines. This parking lot is at a grocery store that shares the lot with a local church. As most offenders usually drive newer or more expensive cars, which per capita seems to represent church parkers, I wonder if this was written this Sunday morning. After all, the car that was currently parked there was parked perfectly, it was afternoon, and I saw the owner come out of the store.


Day 72 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

American logic sometimes confuses every value I was raised on. Senator Cotton at the Republican Convention said “we don’t go to war because we HATE our enemies, we go to war because we LOVE our country”. I wonder if I can apply that statement in my daily life. For example, “I burned down my neighbours fence not because I HATE it, it is ugly, and is leaning dangerously into my property, but because I LOVE my property, and so should everyone else.

Day 73 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Watching a few minutes of the convention cause I need some help falling asleep. Does anyone else find it ironic that Melania is saying that Donald has “loyalty and perseverance”? SHE IS HIS THIRD WIFE!!!

Day 74 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

This what Rogers calls “power outage in your area”


Day 75 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Some prankster thought it was a funny joke to put a mirror behind my monitors in my office as I was in meetings for most of the day. Made me jump out of my skin…but does make for an interesting selfie shot…especially cause my ugly head is not in it.


Day 76 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

I get my allergy shots bi-weekly at my Doctor’s office. I usually go Monday nights after work.

This Monday, I went and saw a sign saying the office was closed for summer hours. Noted that the summer hours has the office open late on Tuesday until 8 pm

On Tuesday, I wen to the Doctor’s office at 6 pm. I was told that the nurse who gives the shots leaves at 5 pm, so I should arrive around before 5 pm. Noted that the summer hours has the office open until 5 pm Wednesday.

On Wednesday, I went to the Doctor’s office at 4:30 pm. The WHOLE OFFICE WAS CLOSED. Noted that the summer hours has the office open from 8:30am – 8:00pm on Thursday.

On Thursday, I went to the Doctor’s office at 830 am. I was greeted by a sign that said that there was no doctor’s available, so shots could not be given until 1 pm and sorry for the inconvenience, but we are open. I was going to blow a gasket, so I went in to the waiting area, and no lights were on and there was another sign that said that there was a staff meeting, and the office was going to be open at 9:30 am. Missed my last bus, had to drive to work, had to leave work early, to finally get my shot at 4 pm yesterday.

I noted the nurse left after giving me the shot at 4:05 pm. I would have  missed her if I showed up at 5..

Day 77 of 100 Days if Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Watched Deadpool on Apple TV a while back. Figured I would see what Apple would suggest I watch tonight. I think there is a problem with their algorithm. based on these recommendations! They probably would recommend I watch Snow White and the Seven Dwarves because I watched The Hateful Eight too!


Day 78 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition


Day 79 of 100 – Days of Dissatisfaction

Checked out the updates on my Blackberry today. Facebook and Twitter were two apps being updated, both of which were ready for some serious upgrade. Installed both. Twitter functions identically as before. Facebook now launches a Web browser which loads the Facebook home page….

Day 80 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Looking to start getting back into guitar, Facebook recommends this for me…


Day 81 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Zellers exists in Ottawa, it seems. But this Zellers is not the one I remember. You know, the one that would give Value Village some good competition. No, this one is a “high end” Zellers. It sells Ralph Loren, Tommy Hilfinger, and stinky stuff to make you smell pretty. Makes me wonder where you can buy quality low-cost clothing.

I have nothing against Value Village, but find it ironic that a thrift store is one of the most popular stores in our well-to-do suburb.

Day 82 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 edition

All the denizen were out shopping at 830 tonight. The StupidStore was packed! In the line up a woman wearing what looked like pyjamas (the ponies on the pants gives it away) broke open a box of Cheerios, and started to grab large handfuls and shoveled them in her mouth, before paying for them. I know she was dressed for breakfast, but wouldn’t the cereal taste better with milk?

Day 83 of 100 Days of Datisfaction

Have you ever worked on a project that seems to have no end, no planning, changing direction, fixed deadlines, and the whole thing may be canned in the near future? This seems to be a recurring theme in my professional life. Lucky for me, I am flexible. I am sure all those that have worked with me (either professionally, socially, or voluntarily) in the past can vouch for that! And no, I don’t mean flexible as in yoga. I have the suppleness of a telephone pole. : )

Day 84 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Raised in Montreal, there was lots to be proud about in that city. The Habs, great venue for fashion and culture, restaurants, Expos, shows, cool buildings and overall style. Things seem to be drifting a bit since I left. Habs, suck. Expos, gone. And now this is the best thing that has come out of the city in near a decade. Who knew this is an art form AND a sport.

Quebec’s Jazzy Alix wins elite North American Pole Dance Championship

Day 85 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition.
No matter where we go, we are blitzed with advertising. Impossible to hide from, but isn’t anything sacred anymore? Found a new place (at Landmark Theatres watching Star Trek Beyond) to insert an add. If anything, it helps my aim. (Side note: wonder how much it would cost to line the inside of their toilet bowls with a quick promo for



Day 86 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Helping a neighbour on the corner of the street as they have been trying to give away their carpets free for a week now. THIS IS A GREAT OFFER! If you are interested, help yourself! Sadly, the free pizza was not a strong enough draw.

Come soon, it will only be around for another week, as that is when the garbage men will come to pick it up.


Day 87 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction -2016 Edition

Taking the city bus from the armpit of Kanata to Gatineau that run on Sunday schedules on Monday. Why does Quebec have to be so different?

Day 88 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Sadly reminded today that this disaster is 18 years old this month

Day 88.5 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Who watches this nonsense? Come on networks, if you want real ratings, drop #BachelorInParadise and start the series #MILFIsland (execs need to listen to Tina Fey of #30rock)

Day 89 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction- 2016 Edition

Shutting three lanes down to 1 and a flashing red traffic light to support construction just out of my office is really improving the infrastructure Gatineau. I get in the bus at the blue dot and take it to Terasse Dr la Chaidiere towards the top of the map. The red lines are showing stand still traffic. The bus ride usually takes 5 minutes for a 2 km ride. Today, a half hour, which is slightly worse than the 20 minutes Monday and Tuesday. Note photo this pm. About the same as this am. Glad I am not driving. Photo credit Paul-Emile Gaudet Note that apart from Queensway, all is fluid…



Day 90 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

HHHHOTTTT! and no, I am not talking my looks. In fact, I think I sweated more in my office than I did outside! There was absolutely no air flow!

Day 91 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

(for yesterday) Construction continues in Gatineau.. Bus stop had to be moved from outside my office. Not knowing where the temporary stop was, I walked to the the previous stop (about a 1km walk, so no real big deal). I got on the bus to find that the temporary stop was in fact just across the road from my office, with the signage on the BACK of the construction sign. I guess everyone is suffering from budget cuts, but duct tape and paper quite innovative.

Day 92 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Another garbage day on a Saturday. A great to enjoy the warm air, smell the fresh rotting meat, and inhale some flies. I happen to live on a circular street, and people drive on it like a NASCAR oval. We have friendly neighbourhood junk collectors who drive slowly up and down the streets looking at other people’s crap. I heard a large bang outside my front door and heard glass shatter. It seems like a Dale Ernhardt crashed into junk collector who decoded to stop to look at the curb. Blocked my driveway for a half hour.p photo credit#voyeurbruce


Day 93 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

First day of new exercise routine and I overslept, and only exercised for 5 minutes. Read the ‘perfect’ songs to wake up to list, by psych. PhD candidate David Greenberg. Cant say I agree. I would turn these songs off and trash my music player, then go back to bed.



Day 94 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

If you ever want to understand fully what it is like to drive in the city of Ottawa, go grocery shopping. Everyone in the centre of the lane moving very slowly with no room to pass.

Day 95 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition


Please people, coat hooks are not meant for toilet paper. People can get hurt reaching that high.

Day 96 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Proof positive that the American elections are just too long…when a comment comes back as a Facebook memory a year later


Day 97 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Why isn’t the Octagon an Olympic sport? They have BMX biking and golf. I mean, what next? Pantomime horse racing?


Day 98 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition

Was talking to Cait about books and am still amazed how digital editions of books are more expensive than paper. They are also harder to share with friends as security is injected in the electronic copy. Great purchase for people who don’t like to share.

Day 99 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – 2016 Edition
Went to a store. Since when does colouring books cost $30? No wonder parents are bankrupt! BTW they are free on Internet




To most of your chagrin, another year has come to an end! With so much to be dissatisfied for, this year was in fact easier than last year.

The last day is going to be hard to be dissatisfied, it is Wifey’s birthday (Cait Gordon), so drop her a line and send her some warm fuzzies! Love ya bunches babe and have a great day of doing Cait-like things.

With this years coming to an end, I have to say, if I am dissatisfied with is it the amount of time I spend on social media posting dissatisfied posts! The point of the posts is a reminder to the time when social media was a sharing of what is going on in one’s life, and not simply a meme generator.

So, instead, I will bring all these posts together, and stick them on the web site so you can enjoy for all time to come. From there, you will see postings of things that irk me (as well as here on facebook too)

Thanks for reading!

What is Up with Yogurt?

Growing up, I could not drink milk. The smell, and the taste, really made me wretch. Ever seen a group of kids when one throws up, they all do? That would be me that started that chain, and it usually would happen when the free milk was distributed!  I was not quite as weak stomached as Wendell Borton from the Simpsons, but pretty close!

Wendell Borton, the kid no one wanted to be near because everything made him sick

Kids and adults do need their calcium. I loved milk products, but not milk in itself. Put in chocolate syrup in my milk, and poof, I would be able to drink it. Loved the cream of ice cream too!  I recall the first bit of advice my doctor gave me was that I HAD to drink milk straight up.  No chocolate, no fruity cereal mixed, just straight in a glass. In most cases I would try to obediently suck up my discomfort, but every time I was encouraged by my parents or teachers to drink milk straight up, I would just regurgitate the whole thing.  I could not even take the smell of milk! To this day, it promotes a gag reflex.

The only thing that helped my calcium depleted body was cheese, ice cream, and yogurt.

I want to be pretty clear about this, the yogurt with the fruit on the bottom back in the day was not that appealing.  The yogurt on the top was extremely sour. You had to work hard to get at the fruit, and the fruit at the bottom did not resemble anything like fruit.  It tasted more like a chemical afterthought. Getting to the fruit was a non-worthwhile fight, having to drill through the horrible smelling congealed mess on the top.

The choice was also limiting. You had about five flavours – strawberry, raspberry, blueberry, peach, and plain. The  fruit on bottom yogurt “reigned supreme” in stores.  There was a claim that it was healthy, but no one admitted to liking this yogurt. Very few kids had it packed in their lunch boxes. The smell of this was ungodly on its own, never mind combined with peanut butter sandwiches. Any health benefits would be sustained if you were able to keep the stuff down, a very difficult feat for most. But in the late 70s, yogurt got a new twist and became a bit more trendy.

The French sold stirred yogourt for some time. Yoplait had been around for a while, and as the French were always recognized for “haute cuisine” and refined food culture, Americans jumped over the opportunity to market the heck out of this.  Yoplait had a huge advertising campaign hiring various big name celebrities eating their yogurt.  I recalled really being impressed by Tommy Lasorda, the manager for the LA Dodgers at the time, sounding so fluent in French.

One actor, Judd Hirsch from the hit show Taxi, despised yogurt, and Yoplait stirred yogurt at the time was not really very good. It tasted very watery and had a bad aftertaste.  It was a step up from the fruit on bottom types, but it was still a bit of an acquired tasted.  Judd had to do several takes, each time gagging up the yogurt, before finally perfecting the commercial below. You will notice how he takes very little of the yogurt in comparison to Lasorda.

Judd Hirsch

Tommy Lasorda


Loretta Swit from Mash

Thankfully, companies like Dannon and Delisle around the same time started to produce stirred yogurt.  To me, Yoplait was what yogurt tastes like if it was made with water instead of milk.  At least Delisle had a creamy texture that was an upgrade. The sweetness, the fruit, and the creaminess, made the yogurt  much more palatable, and in fact  was addictive. I ate the stuff by the boat loads.

I am not sure exactly when yogurt became a fad, but I am guessing something started to happen in the 90s.  Yogurt really stopped tasting like yogurt and I questioned if it really was yogurt anymore.

Society became crazed about “fat free” foods. Frozen yogurt suddenly started filling the ice cream section as a lower fat option.  Though some brands truly did offer an ice-creamified version of yogurt for the true yogurt die-hards, others crafted the flavour to broaden the market. Ever eat chocolate frozen yogurt? Tastes just like a fudgicle. Vanilla frozen yogurt tasted like a creamer vanilla ice cream. My wifey and I were so totally shocked when we first tried it, that we had to put it to the test on someone who despised yogurt. Just so happened that my mother-in-law, who was raised in the days when yogurt tasted like something spawned by the devil, was a good candidate. She hated yogurt so much that the thought of eating it made her gag. We were so convinced that she would not know the difference, that we served her vanilla frozen yogurt as ice cream.  She ate it, and she could not stop singing its praises. As she ate it, she went on and on about how creamy and tasty this ice cream was, and asking where we got it. Then wifey told her it was yogurt,  she stopped dead in her tracks, as if she was struck by a slege-hammer.  She enjoyed it, but I don’t think she ever bought it for herself (the wounds of 60s yogurts lie deep, after all). In hindsight, that was not a very nice experiment, but it did demonstrate a point.

The 90s introduced Yogen-Fruz to accelerate the frozen yogurt trend.  It gave you the option of choosing combinations of fruit and blending them in an ice-creamy treat.  They difference they offered from stores was the variety of flavours. You can now have melon and pineapple in your yogurt. You can bury it in sprinkles and whipped cream. This was not the yogurt I remember as a youth – but it was good!  Yogurt found a niche – it was all about the cream and sugar, not this hardened congealed thing I grew up with.

Can this truly be yogurt? Is this a healthy alternative to a bag of chips?

A friend, who despised yogurt in the 80s, told me once that yogurt was Latin for “’I’m hungry and there’s nothing else in the fridge”. With the advent of frozen yogurt, not only were we actively buying and snacking on the stuff, but we were starting to see new variations enter the marketplace. The French were no longer trendy in the yogurt world. After all, Yoplait had nothing on Yogen Fruz.  The cream was what was selling the stuff. Liberte, a Canadian company, introduced “Mediterranean” style. They took the queue from frozen yogurt, made a product that was full of fattening yogurt-styled cream, and did some cool combinations of fruit, like peach and passion, and orange and mango. Even traditional fruits, like strawberry, tasted much better in this creamy brand. They also perfected adding coffee to yogurt. It was also easier to stir up this fruit on bottom yogurt. The cream at the top was soft and rich and edible on its own. Since the French stirred yogurts were originally intended for desserts, Liberte introduced dessert yogurts. You could get Apple a la mode, and orange and marzipan flavours.

The 90s also tried to promote this dessert food as healthy. Throw in probiotic cultures, and poof you are doing your body good.  The non-fat variants were lacking in texture, but offered an option for those that preferred non-fat and heavily chemically injected tastes to the natural options. Variety packs of yogurts became the norm, which was a shame if you liked only one flavour. If there was a four pack. You would get three different fruit yogurts and one vanilla. Side note, I often thought adding one vanilla yogurt was a brilliant cost cutting means of selling yogurt. The trendy yogurts were more expensive. The non-fat crap was always cheap.

Then about five years ago, the Greeks were making a dive into yogurt making. Honestly, the only connection I made with Greek food and yogurt was tzatziki sauce (which is awesome). Though tzatziki is yogurt based, it was far removed from the fruit-based yogurt I knew. The Greek yogurts became a rage. To my taste, they are a little less creamier than the Mediterranean version I knew.  I found it interesting that despite the economic chaos that was happening in Greece during that time, which also had ripple effects around the world, the Greeks suddenly perfected the creamy yogurt with 12 grams of protein per pack. Sad truth, the Americans were the marketing brains behind this recipe, and they did not give any kickbacks to Greece for branding rights.  Greek yogurt made up to 50% of yogurt sales in the US in 2014, which translates to over three billion dollars in revenue. The Greeks did not see any of that money…

The supermarkets are now flooded with yogurts. In my local store, an entire aisle is now dedicated to yogurt. I even saw an “Icelandic” yogurt. I have no idea what is special about Icelandic yogurt, maybe they add some fish in it.  You can buy yogurt with various granolas, or seeds, and watch your calorie count go from 100 to 600.

yogurt aisle.
My local grocery store. You have more choice of yogurt than you do of anything else.
Icelandic yogurt
What makes Iceland special in the yogurt world?

And in our current political climate, we have French yogurt, we have Mediterranean and Greek yogurts, and Icelandic versions, when will we get a truly American version?  The US is one of the biggest yogurt producers in the world. They even bought out Yoplait.  Can you imagine what an American yogurt would be like? It probably loves guns, kicks ass, and takes pride in political ignorance (especially in comparison with countries where yogurt originated). One thing I could imagine, if an American-styled yogurt came out, there may be a ban on all imported yogurts from the middle east (unless heavily vetted).  Bye bye Liberte Mediterranean.

My question is, do people really love yogurt so much? If you had a choice between a bag of Doritos or a 125 ml container of yogurt, what would you naturally gravitate towards?

For me, seeing the craze worries me. We eat yogurt, we are using it to treat wounds and sunburns, and we are drinking it!  What is next fad? Yogurt cheese? Yogurt-based toothpaste?  I am all for the evolution of a product, but with so much variety of not just yogurt, but many products, decisions are much more complex than they once were. It is a reflexion of our culture, in a sense.  We have evolved from a binary “it is yogurt” or not, do variants of yogurts. Our time is becoming more and more consumed with thinking of different subtypes. It is ok once you find the subtype you like, but it can take a while.

To close, when I was first married, my wifey asked me to buy some ham. I asked her what type of ham she wanted. After all, there is black forest ham, smoked ham, Parisian ham, baked ham, canned ham, and the list goes on. Her response was, buy me “ham ham”.

I got the point. Yogurt is no different. There really is no such thing as “just yogurt” anymore. Like everything, with so many options, grocery shopping is more time killing exercise as we now have to focus in and silly things like multiple subvariants of products  that in their original state, we would not even like.



100 Days of Guitar Riffs

Who can be dissatisfied with music? Well, I have been playing guitar on and off for 30 years, and well, it has been more “off” than “on”. I pretty much completely stopped playing 4 years ago, and figured I needed a kick-start. So here was my indulgent challenge, to record 100 riffs in 100 days that I posted daily on Facebook and Twitter. As these are done daily, some recordings are ok, others not so ok, but that is ok. This is all in the spirit of fun and learning! Also tried to make it 100 different bands during this process (after all, if it were completely up to me, I would do all Rush, Police, and Iron Maiden!)

Below are the posts with the clues and answers (I did not give the answers during the postings). Enjoy and let me know your favorites!

Day 1 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – First one a bit of a deeper cut, but a fan favourite for this band. Don’t shoot the guitar player –  YYZ, Rush

Day 2 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – This band a staple in my early guitar repertoire. – Pride, U2

Day 3 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Always my fav at highschool dances.  Suffraget City, David Bowie

Day 4 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – This guy was the opening act for the first concert I ever saw (Blue Oyster Cult). Fantasy – Aldo Nova

Day 5 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – The rhythm guitarist in this recording should be fired for laziness… Fire Woman, The Cult

Day 6 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – One of the best performers I have ever seen…Run to You, Bryan Adams

Day 7 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Have to have this band, at least once… The Trooper, Iron Maiden

Day 8 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Band made wearing the Union Jack fashionable, Hysteria, Def Leppard

Day 9 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – To me, these guys defined the sound of the 80s! Do Do Do, Da Da Da, The Police

Day 10 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs –  Apologies, very fast & poor recording of an 80s rocker…Rebel Yell,Billy Idol

Day 11 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – A song that was played a lot on relatively new radio station the Bear when I starting doing work in Ottawa…December, Collective Soul

Day 12 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs –  First band I listened to, and every guitarists go to riff…Day Tripper, The Beatles

Day 13 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Despised this band in high school, then saw them live in the 90s and “I got them”…Personal Jesus, Depeche Mode

Day 14 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Tia Carrere re-popularized this classic tune in the 90s in Wayne’s World. Did you know she won an Oscar for her vocals (not on this song though!)

Day 15 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – My second stab at British New Wave of Heavy Metal…Breaking the Law, Judas Priest

Day 16 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Got to love when Indie bands make it, in this case to the mainstream alternative scene. Added bonus, they are Scottish…Franz Ferdinand, Take Me Out

Day 17 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Love these guys who brought blues to whole new level…Crossroads, Cream

Day 18 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Easy today…NEED MORE COWBELL…Don’t Fear the Reaper, Blue Oyster Cult

Day 19 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Album to support my first reunion tour concert in 1983ish….Knocking at Your Back Door, Deep Purple 

Day 20 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – An untouchable, done really really badly (had an off day and am too lazy to redo)…Let’s Talk About Love, Van Halen

Day 21 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – My first taste in punk…London Calling, The Clash

Day 22 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – This should be the US Election theme song…Don’t Stop Believing, Journey

Day 23 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – This guitarist was arguably the most difficult to work with…many people were fired in his band….Long Live Rock N Roll, Rainbow

Day 24 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – One of the great alternative bands of the 80s…Boys Don’t Cry, The Cure

Day 25 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Get your dancing shoes on! This may be difficult to recognize without the vocal Woowoos, but probably not for fans of the band….I Was Made For Loving You, KISS

Day 26 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – The Rockman I bought when I started playing bote this guitarist’s signature…More than a Feeling, Boston

Day 27 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – A classic track that has been Brucified, or butchered, depends on your perspective…Painted Black, The Rolling Stones

Day 28 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – A little bit of Celtic rock tonight…well, sort of…Zombie, Cranberries

Day 29 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Wifey, says you cannot be a true musician unless you watched the documentary about this band…Tonight I’m Gonna Rock You, Spinal Tap

Day 30 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Beatles wannabes….Wonderwall, Oasis

Day 31 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Probably one of the easiest lead lines ever written (in the verse), but most iconic…Smells Like Teen Spirit

Day 32 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – First time I have EVER tried playing anything from this band…You Shook Me All Night Long, ACDC

Day 33 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Lazy today…first guitar riff I ever learned. Sunday, Bloody Sunday, U2

Day 34 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Feeling a bit snake-like today…Slither, Velvet Revolver

Day 35 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Hard to believe this band auditioned a new singer via a reality TV show…Devil Inside, INXS

Day 36 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Not sure what genre you would call these guys, but fun distinctive riff though…Rock Lobster, B-52s

Day 37 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – This is the band’s 2nd singer. From movie Heavy Metal…Mob Rules, Black Sabbath

Day 38 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Not a religious song…and very challenging to play…Hail to the King, Avenged Sevenfold

Day 39 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – This song not about a stairway….and the “vocalist” needs to be fired…Living Loving Maid, Led Zepplin

Day 40 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Without Daylight Savings Time, I could use one of these for the next 4 months…Holiday, Green Day

Day 41 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Grandfather of Grunge = easier riff today (and cool)…Rockin the Free World, Neil Young

Day 42 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – This band has the funniest lyrics…Big Mough Strikes Again, The Smiths

Day 43 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – These guys played with Rush at RNR HOF induction! Everlong, Foo Fighters

Day 44 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – These guys got a great deal with Microsoft for Window’s 95! Undone Weezer

Day 45 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Never really got this guy, but EVH played on this track…Beat It, Michael Jackson

Day 46 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – See if you can recognize this twisted version of 80s pop classic…Tainted Love (Soft Cell/Marilyn Manson

Day 47 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – All songs from this album are very riffofday worth…Where Ever I May Roam

Day 48 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Big on alternative radio in 2007.I dont do song justice…Dashboard, Modest Mouse

Day 49 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Track 1 of a man unkind to bats first solo album. Left us way too young…I Don’t Know, Ozzy Osbourne

Day 50 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Half way there! Always loved the tone of this song…Run Like Hell, Pink Floyd

Day 51 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Song was #1 song on CHOM FM’s top 10@10 4over1year…lyrics unintelligible 2me…Still Loving You, the Scorpions

Day 52 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – 1 of my favorite guitarists, and most underrated…Lay It on the Line, Triumph

Day 53 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Inspired by an Alice in Chains/Gretchen Wilson cover…Barracuda, Heart

Day 54 of 100 Days of Guitar – 2nd person (perhaps) to benefit from fame of Nirvana….Celebrity Skin, Hole

Day 55 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Wrestler Tommy Dreamer’s entrance theme tune…Man in the Box, Alice in Chains

Day 56 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Favorite cover was from TV serie BSG, S3, last episode…All Along the Watchtower, Jimi Hendrix

Day 57 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Wore this album out when I discovered punk…Pretty Vacant, The Sex Pistols

Day 58 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Always liked the humour of this band…Blister in the Sun, The Violent Femmes

Day 59 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs –  Hard one today, not unless you are a fan of Freddy Krueger. Dream Warriors, Dokken

Day 60 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs –  Avril Lavigne’s ex-husband’s band.  Hell Song, Sum 41

Day 61 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs
Appropriate sun for a sunny day, too bad today was not. Shiny Happy People, REM

Day 62 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Simply put, a great toe tapping song, Kryptonite, 3 Doors Down

Day 63 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Part of title key lyric in most of band’s songs…Californication, Red Hot Chilli Peppers

Day 64 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs -Overplayed 1 hit wonder in early 2000. Hanging by a Moment, Lifehouse

Day 65 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Song supposedly inspired by ZZTop, but I can’t hear it! Cowboys From Hell, Pantera

Day 66 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Anyone remember Spitting Image? Land of Confusion, Genesis

Day 67 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Blake Lewis sang this song on American Idol…who cares. You Give Love a Bad Name, Bon Jovi

Day 68 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Going to the swamp today. Around the Bend, CCR

Day 69 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Hunger games actor, who is a cool guitarist

Day 71 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Best metal band name ever. Hanger 18, Metallica

Day 72 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Like if you recognize. Song 2 of 80s Hair Metal Week…singer had no hair

Day 73 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Song 3 of 80s Hair Metal Week…Why did these guys give themselves a name Disney would be proud of? Nobody’s Fool, Cinderella

Day 74 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Song 3 of 80s Hair Metal Week…Band’s guitarist known for his fretboard tapping, not heard so much in this song though.

Day 75 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Song 4 of 80s Hair Metal Week…Milton Berle was the lead singer’s uncle and makes cameo in video, Round and Round, Ratt

Day 76 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Song 5 of 80s Hair Metal Week…These guys threw Bibles at their audience during their shows. Glad no one got hurt! Soldiers Under Command, Stryper

Day 77 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs
Song 7 of 80s Hair Metal Week…Bit ironic, but this band’s lead singer had a recent feud with yesterday’s band’s lead singer, 18 and Life, Skid Row

Day 78 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – This song is so metal, it makes me laugh. What makes me laugh more is how I recorded this. Reigning Blood, Slayer

Day 79 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Had a friend who loved this video and watched it endless times…wonder why. Sharp Dressed Man, ZZTop

Day 80 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Band may get more $ if Marijuana legalized in Canada. China Grove, Doobie Brothers

Day 81 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – These guys,from my hometown, played my high school before they became famous. Sign of the Gypsie Queen, April Wine

Day 82 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – A punk that uses jazz chords? Go figure. Rusted from the Rain, Billy Talent

Day 83 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – So sorry, horrible recording, too tired to fix. Life is a Highway, Tom Cochran:

Day 84 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs
One of my favorite bands. They played this entire album opening for Rush. Also one of my favorite albums

Day 85 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Toronto-based band all met as kids. Bandname comes from the Catholic church they all attended. Who knew?

Day 86 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs
Another underrated guitarist and songwriter, though the singer deserves the “Queen of Rock” title. Hit Me With Your Best Shot, Pat Benatar

Day 87 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Crank it up..synonmys for this band’s name include: pirates, college fraternities, Western posses, rag-tag mercenary

Day 88 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – I am married to one…Pretty Woman, Roy Orbison

Day Christmas of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Just Putzing Around the Christmas Tree!
Merry Xmas everyone!

Day 89 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs –
The song that opened the door to the world of Progressive Metal for me…Pull Me Under, Dream Theater

Day 90 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Testing out a Xmas gift…a shure sm57 microphone…go easy folks, 1st time doing this. Hyperdrive, Devin Townsend Project
Day 91 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Always amazed what some metal bands will cover..Blue Monday, Orgy
Day 92 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – First song I recall using prolific f-bombing on the radio…Last Resort, Papa Roach
Day 93 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – One of the great losses for 2016, Life in the Fast Lane, Eagles
Day 94 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs –  Sort of like the retro groove of this song…
Day 95 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Bruce Dickinson does an awesome cover of this song…Behind Blue Eyes, The Who
Day 96 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Great song for returning to the office…Welcome to the Jungle, Guns ‘N’ Roses
Day 97 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – One of the best covers of this song, released in 1985

Day 98 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Song was overkilled on radio, but I like it now…Twilight Zone, Golden Earring

Day 99 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs – Easy phone number to remember…8675309, Tommy Tutone

Day 100 of 100 Days of Guitar Riffs  – I end this journey with the song that, as a 13 year old, made me dream of playing guitar. I have learned a lot with this exercise, thanks for indulging me over the last 100 days!

Running into a brick wall

Shut that NOISE!

Music is so subjective.  Why is it that when I hear a sustained note on David Gilmour’s (of Pink Floyd) guitar it brings a tear to my eye, and yet when I hear the repeated loops and processed vocals of any song in our current top 40, I want to repeatedly run into a brick wall to the cadence of the electronic drums?

I admit to not being that up to date with what is the latest and greatest musically.  In my older age, I am finding it harder to memorize band names that choose random letters, rearrange them, and add a “featuring some domestic animal (ie Pit Bull)”.  It is much easier to remember names like “Beatles”, or “Queen” than Ty Dolla $ign.

I want to repeatedly run into a brick wall to the cadence of the electronic drums

Looping Ad Nauseum

I started realizing how out of touch I was with about four years ago. My gym shut down and I was forced to sign up with the Good Life. I would hit the gym at 5:30 am, and the same songs were cranked through the airwaves.  It was electronica on steroids!  The beats did not motivate me. In fact, it made me want to run from the gym screaming!  What was even worse is that these beats became “ear worms”.  They stuck with me for the whole day!!

I am not sure how this type of music moves people emotionally, except, maybe to talk louder, become more agitated,  and to make more noise over the din.  Repetitive looping is popular in our iTunes generation. Though it is rhythmic, composing music has migrated from writing albums, to singles for iTunes, then to the new reality where single bars are composed that are repeated and layered. If you can talk rhythmically and cannot sing, you can always use auto-tune! If you don’t believe me, install Songify. You can write a catchy song by saying a few words and let the software do the trick!

If you cannot sing, you can always use auto-tune!

Ever go for a walk in the mall?  The stores blare “loops” to try to entice shoppers.  Ever hear house parties in the neighbourhood? Loops are blaring on outdoor speakers for all to enjoy!

Yesterday was Canada Day. I walked briefly around the neighbourhood to see what the denizen were up to. There were lots of house parties, all playing “house” music with those same repetitive beats and loops.  In fact, the looping started as early as 8 am. The only activity planned at that time was a senior’s breakfast. I can only imagine how well that music went with eating pancakes and sausage first thing in the morning.  Sausage grease aside, the music alone would give me indigestion!  The songs were so similar, in fact, that the variety of loops just blended into each other creating a weird dissonant harmony.

It All Sounds the Same

My walk in the ‘hood demonstrated how similar modern music is.  You would think with all the variety of notes, tempos, chords, and timings there would be an infinite number of different songs available.  Especially when you break things down to the “bits and bytes” level. Is it possible to run out of new music? Well, technically no (as illustrated in a fun 10 minute youtube video on this subject, which gets a little geeky), but it sure feels like it.  There are literally billions and billions of musical variants and possibilities. Reality, though,  we tend to gravitate to certain patterns we like more than others and are influenced by what came before us.

Is it possible to run out of new music? Well, technically no, but sure feels like it

This also applies to lyrics. There is a notion called “common poetic meter”.   Emily Dickinson was known to use this rhyming scheme in most of her poetry.  It is why the songs like Amazing Grace,  House of the Rising Sun, and Giligan’s Island can almost interchange the lyrics with the melody.  Speaking of which, the song “Stairway to Gilligan’s Island”  takes the concept and stretches it a bit

One thing that has not changed in musical history is the nature of popular music.  If something sells, the market will get saturated with it.  How many ripoffs of the Beach Boys were there in the 60s?  The artists all looked like the Beatles too!

What Changed?

If what history demonstrates is true, that humans gravitate to certain musical patterns that have some influences from what came before us, then our tastes should always be evolving.  It seems, though, in my case, that my tastes are evolving back in history, and not keeping up with the times.  I am now appreciating the songs I did not like on AM radio. Disco no longer sucks! At least there is a band playing! I am regressing, not progressing with the musical times!

Disco no longer sucks! At least there is a band playing!

Growing up, I only had access to an AM radio that had a few stations. There was only really one radio station that played music, so it was “genre agnostic”.  Your listening ears really perked up when you heard John Denver following a great kick-ass Van Halen song.

The nice thing about listening to music like that is that you never knew what song was coming.  If you did not like a song, you would not pay much attention to it as the next song may be better. If you liked a song, you would buy a 45 to repeatedly listen to it, or maybe purchase the album if you wanted to deeper explore that sound.  Admittedly, I bought several albums I am embarrassed to admit owning (do any of you have Barry Manilow or Abba in your collections?).

We tend to gravitate to certain patterns we like more than others and are influenced by what came before us

As there was only one or two stations, everyone in the house heard the same songs. Whether we liked them or not, we knew them all. The household participated in the music.

There came a point where the music became less household and more personal.

Turn That Noise Off!

Music sometimes shows the division between the generations. I recall my parents liking some of the music I listened to, like the Beatles, or some of the current bands of the 70s.

In the early 80s, I started to listen to FM radio. FM offered music radio stations catering to a certain style. As my musical tastes refined, I gravitated more to rock.   I bought my first rock album, Rush’s Exit Stage Left, and started to play it with Geddy Lee’s screeching vocals. It was that album that triggered the first “What is that you are listening to” response from my parents. The fact that Rush earned the Order of Canada did not matter. I think most teens and parents have had that experience. Do you remember yours?

Rush was the first band that my parents asked me to turn down the volume when I listened to music! The fact they earned the Order of Canada did not matter.

If the axiom of musical gravitation holds true, that we gravitate to patterns we know, then there was likely nothing that Rush offered to my parents that connected them to their musical experience. For me, there was a natural evolution of Beatles, Cream, Led Zeppelin, Deep Purple, Black Sabbath, and Rush. There is a connection of musical influences.  Listening to Rush without any musical context can be tricky, especially if one’s context may have stopped at Frank Sinatra.

My Musical Context Has Not Changed

I can listen to some popular music.  There are some artists, like Lady Gaga, who have musical references to my 80s influences. I think that is a general rule for any artists who is in a “super stardom” zone. They speak to all generations musically.  There are a handful out there.  I tend, though, to gravitate to what I know musically, and look to see modern twists on it. Of late, Joe Bonamassa has got my ear. He is a blues guitarists who has lots of progressive rock influences.  That appeals to my musical upbringing. Some long-lasting and well-established bands, like ACDC, Rolling Stones, and Iron Maiden, have multiple generations attending their concerts, all by choice. Justin Beiber have parents attending because they have to for their kids. This may be  bi-product of music being passed down from one generation to another.

Ever since the age of AM radio has stopped, I have seen my musical tastes getting more and more limited as I do not naturally search for styles I don’t gravitate towards. I did not have to listen to country, or rap, so I did not try. In the 90s, radio was becoming more and more refined to genre, and my genre of choice was not well represented.  Rap, house, and sampling became the dominant art form, and as I had no real connection to it, I could not appreciate it. To me, rap and house were pop music purgatory.  For those raised on the evolution of dance and rap music, modern looping is much more natural expression (though I don’t get the gangsta appeal in predominately white suburbia).

Some long-lasting and well-established bands, like ACDC, Rolling Stones, and Iron Maiden, have multiple generations attending their concerts, all by choice. Justin Beiber have parents attending because they have to for their kids.

Music De-valued

Looping music is the easiest form of music to put together. You do not need to play an instrument. You just need a good computer and some knowledge of sound engineering to make “quality” music. If you have a bit of rhythm, you do not even have to sing. It is like reading rhythmic poetry, while talking through a megaphone.

The digital world has made music very easy to put together. Access to streaming services and peer-to-peer networks (like Napster) has dramatically reduced sales. The only way a musician can make money is by touring and branding themselves (KISS is iconic in rock, but music aside it was their ability to sell themselves that was their real talent).

You just need a good computer and some knowledge of sound engineering to make “quality” music.

By looping, the production costs go down. You don’t have to hire musicians, pay money for studio time, and it can be done in a basement.  The focus has shifted to writing a good album, to writing a handful of loops.

The experience for the listener has changed. Once I would intentionally put an album on my record player and listen for 20 minutes, then actively change the side! The artwork and liner notes were interesting to look at while I listened. Now, an album’s art work may be a pdf file that accompany some iTunes purchases. Leafing through a pdf is not the same experience as I play my library of several thousand songs randomly in the background. Music now is background noise, or is used to block out the noise of others. Music has become a passive activity. I now can turn on my Google Music streaming service, enjoy what I am listening to, without actively knowing anything about the artists behind the music. Sad, but true.

Music has become a passive activity.

Even concerts are more about sound, light, and spectacle with less emphasis on musicianship.

Bringing it Home

If music is a household experience, then all the different genres could represent family members. For me, looping is the “Uncle Ralph” that no one wants to talk about because he is obnoxious, says the same stories over and over again, is loud, and does not know when to stop talking.  When Uncle Ralph is at family gatherings, no one wants to get cornered by him.  Most families have an Uncle Ralph. When Uncle Ralph does not attend the family gathering, there may be relief that he is not there, but there may be an underlying feeling that his presence is missed. The family is not really the same without him.

I can say safely, I would not miss Uncle Ralph. My musical home has not evolved to appreciate what he brings to the table.

Things to look at:

On youtube: Kirby Furguson: Everything is a remix

The Shadow Knows – Launch of dissatisfiedbruce

Welcome to the inaugural post of my new blog site,  I have been blogging on and off for the past few years, mostly as an exercise to practice my written communication and to offer some “life” reflections. Thanks to all those who have read my posts in the past and encouraged my writing.  I am always flattered when I hear of someone reading a post or two. Hope it is worth your while!

So why am I blogging about dissatisfaction? Seems quite contrary, after all, preaching the positive is all we hear about.

Ever see Facebook posts written in the form of 100 Days of <insert positive sentiment>?   How do you respond to those?  Like them?  I  sometimes question the need to revel in the fact that someone has a gratitude journal entry of their child picking out a pair of clean underwear for the first time.  I guess it may be an important life moment, especially if the kid prefers to go digging in the laundry bin for last week’s pair of Superman briefs. I too would enjoy wearing superhero underwear, and certainly have had my share of these “life moment” posts.

The Shadow knows…

I have been raised on a culture of Monty Python and Mad magazine.  My favorite Mad cartoonist, Sergio Aragones, had a segment called “The Shadow Knows“, part of the magazine’s “Light makes Right” department.  The humour is simple, and fits in a single frame. There is a scene of something of a typical daily interaction, but the Shadows depict what the players in the scene are truly thinking. There are many examples found on the web, like a solid collection on Pintrest.  The Shadow Knows’ reflects the time and the humour of the 70s, and seeing them now made me realize how we have become much more sensitive to certain topics. That said, I believe the concept is inherent to most humans, and I am certainly guilty of that. I try to do what is right, but sometimes my desire is to do something completely different.

I wonder sometimes, what does the Shadow know when he sees a Facebook post about one’s grateful reflection about how a colour of a flower brightened a whole day? Would the Shadow actually be dealing with a basement that is flooding with water, with kids that are sick, and a husband (or wife) that has decided to run off with the plumber?

I am wired in reality. I can take Facebook posts at face value, but sometimes I wonder if there is something lurking beneath the warm fuzzy sentiments I see. My personality, for example, would not focus on the flower. I would see what the Shadow sees, and focus on the plumber draining my bank account (while, hopefully, draining my basement). Note, I will never run off with anyone who will model their hairy butt crack in low hanging jeans.

What is more satisfying and interesting?
Looking at a colourful flower, or a plumber?

Often, when I read gratitude posts that should only be metaphors, I wonder what is the true motivation. The metaphor means something to someone, but I just don’t get it. I would love to hear the “why”  the metaphor was posted and “how” it applies to the person posting it. In short, I appreciate the story behind the message, something which gets missed in this 140 character messaged world.  The absence of the story sometimes makes the sentiment a bit vapid, and without substance to me. Whether intentional or not, it can come out as insincere. Was the flower truly the inspiration of the day? Was there more going on that meets the eye? Inquiring minds want to know!

Imagine the following scenario.

My car breaks down and I lost a day of work. Definitely not a good thing and my day is ruined, and, perhaps, laced with stress. I post on Facebook “Day 1 of 100 days of loving life. My life is now fulfilled because I had an orgasmic-tasting meal at McDonald’s (personally, I would find McDonald’s more diarrhetic, but that’s just me) .

Why ignore what really happened? For me, the story is not complete. It would be more interesting if McD’s  is the only choice of restaurant I had, I was hungry while waiting on a mechanic, and I am  a vegetarian (not true, but adding for illustrative purposes). Sad story. Not fun to go through, and if I was a vegan, would struggle with wanting to eat their fries as it is deep fried with their chicken? What if I tried a Big Mac for the first time in 30 years?  The meal would not be the best, but the their is more interest and some funny ironies.  Remember, I would be waiting on the estimates from the mechanic, which will jack up the price of that McNugget-less lunch to that of a beluga caviar! The Facebook post only shared a small, and slightly untrue, part of the picture. The Shadow knows all, and it is more fun!

Never satisfied by truth…

I do like to hear other people’s stories, and really appreciate it when tools like Facebook are being used in this capacity, as opposed to being an auto-meme generator (and re-generating times 100).  In fact, my timeline has more jokes, memes, shares, and videos than actual events of what is going on in people’s lives. It is an important aspect of Facebook, but not very deep and satisfying. They are the McDonald’s of posts.

Fast food can be quite satisfying.
Until you eat more than two bites. I can attest to this with my annual KFC cravings.

As much as I like to read about the day-to-day stuff, it is sometimes hard and sobering to be reminded of what you don’t have.  Not everyone can go on a family trip to Europe, not everyone has the cash to buy a Mercedes Benz each month like I would buy a bus pass.  That can be a source of dissatisfaction. The whole notion of being able to “keep up with the Jones'” is present, no matter how much I deny it.  I think that is a bi-product of living in a world that defines a normal on what I own, the title of my job, how far I travel, the size of my family, the depth of my swimming pool, the fur lining in my slippers, the price of my breakfast cereal, and how green and evenly trimmed my grass is. The moment I put my satisfaction in materialism, it becomes very easy to become dissatisfied. Reminders of how the material brings (what seems to be) satisfaction to those around me can bring about dissatisfaction. Got to remember to be satisfied with my ripped jeans and socks with holes in them, and my cedar hedge that is growing wildly and taking up three quarters of my yard, not to mention that I have yet to find a gluten-free cereal that resembles the taste of  Lucky Charms.

What is your favorite cereal?
Alpen. Only one that fills me up. Gluten-free nightmare!

I find it even harder to understand how  material “blessings” gets wrapped up under the “God” banner, which sometimes gets proclaimed by certain extreme religious folk. The irony is religion does not normally preach materialism (though I understand some sects do). They will be thankful to God for answering prayers that they got a job with a huge salary increase, wonderful house with swimming pool, and healthy family. They post religious platitudes on social media which are totally meaningless, and frankly, insulting, to people like me who are not engaged in these circles. These platitudes are just blanket faith statements like “Leave your problems at the foot of the cross”. I have no idea what that means, especially without any substantiation like I mentioned above. On an aside,  I have never seen anyone thanking God directly for an amputated limb, loss of job, family getting involved in organized crime, or for making Disco suits fashionable. I get that does not seem right, but you do hear, for example, UFC fighters thanking Jesus for blessing them with the ability to kick the crap out of someone; or wealthy families thankful for their financial income. That too, sounds wrong.

The 100 Days series…

With all these thoughts jumbled in my head, I took on the challenge last year of writing my 100 Days of Dissatisfaction on Facebook. They somewhat expressed my Shadow.  All I did was track a thought in my mind each day that annoyed me.  It could be my reaction to the odd neighbour, or someone who smelled like they slept with their dog.  I found that writing about them was humourous and cathartic. Further, people who knew me got the humour of it.  What amazed me was that I was able to keep this going for 100 days. It was not difficult.  I have supported a football team that has struggled for years. I have never seen my baseball team win a World Series. I am well off, but I can never seem to keep up with the Jones’ (not that I want to). I have seen 5 year olds on youtube play guitar better than me despite my having over 30 years of experience.  I see people smiling doing the mundane, or smile when I know they really want to cut off someone’s head. Not to mention, I can write a book about my perceptions of my OCTranspo (Ottawa bus service) experiences.

What amazes me more is that there are some people who took some of my posts very seriously, and to heart.  I can laugh at my “dissatisfaction”.  I am revealing “my Shadow”, which some may appreciate to be something resembling a truth, and I hope, not too many are offended.

Seeing all this dissatisfaction through a homourous lens actually opened my eyes to the good stuff in life. By making light of the stuff that annoys you, it is easier not to be brought down by them. You learn just laugh it off.

Wifey survived my 100 Days of Dissatisfaction. She would groan in pain each day when she read my Facebook feed. So what did she do?

And now for something completely different…

She registered the domain to help me continue the tradition! That action in itself was one of the ironies that is a foundation to this blog. The Web site is dedicated to her (I am sure, to her chagrin), as she is the person I have spent the last 25 years complaining to about all this stuff. She is the one that puts up with my cynical and cantankerous ways – but most importantly, we have spent most of this time laughing with,  through all the ups and downs of life, and finding irony and sarcasm to cope with the tough stuff.  It is the tradition I hope to continue through the writings in future.

Dissatisfied with marriage?
Not me! I got the best wifey in the world!

I posted the original 100 Days of Dissatisfaction done in 2015 as the official first post of the site.  I am in the process of compiling another one this year.  I am finding that each post could be a story in themselves, which I will share every now and again.

Let me know what disatissfies you (apart from this blog!). It can make for a great entry!



2015 Edition

Day 1 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction –  Day is done. It is 9:30 pm

Day 2 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – auto flush did not work all day in bathrooms in the office

Day 3 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction  – I know I am bad at arithmetic, but trying to figure out the science fiction math of a budget is beyond my comprehension. Where do these numbers come from?

Day 4 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – simply put – ‘lunch at Marcello’s’ featuring their all you can puke buffet

Day 5 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – brought my lunch to work today, only to remember that I brought it as I bought a chicken salad at Subways!

Day 6 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I barely moved from my couch

Day 7 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – it is now 5:37, I do not know what I did today or recall time flying by so quickly!!

Day 7 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – when 32C feels like an arctic blast (editors note, I guess I forgot I already did a Day 7, or miscounted later on)

Day 8 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – empty 61 zoomed by me at Lebreton. The bus was empty. Sent tirade to OCTRANSPO . ‪#‎overheating‬

Day 9 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – requested James Bond film Licence to Kill from the library. Went to the library to pick it up and ended up getting ‘License to Kill’ starring Denzel Washington. Did not realise one letter difference in titles mattered!

Day 10 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – yesterday I waited for 45 minutes for my 5 minute doctor’s appointment and I was second one to arrive at the clinic. But maybe I should be thankful! Today, wifey had to wait the normal 2 hours for her 10 minute appointment.

Day 11 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I was going to say seeing the Dentist (easy way out). But since my teeth  are looking cleaner, I cant really say that I am dissatisfied. You may ask what is my secret to achieving such good oral hygiene? Well the only thing I have done differently over the last several months is to eat copious amounts of jujubes!! What I am truly dissatisfied today is that I really got sucked into a Facebook vortex and wasted too much time on it. Yes, I am off work today!

Day 12 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – was thinking of activities to do around town during my week break. I have seen most of the tourist sites but found this little gem which is right around the block from my home. Suggested it to wifey. Response – ‘you got to be kidding me’ . Wifey dissatisfied, which by extension, I am.

Day 13 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – a “404 error” in the web world means that a page cannot be found on a web site you are visiting. Most sites would display a page that says something like “page not found, maybe you should try to look for your page here..”. I saw a post showing how the conservative party is taking their attack adds toward Justin Trudeau even to their web site. Here is their 404 – My reaction…shouldn’t you invest your time running the country instead of attacking your opposition? Flip side, the liberal’s web site – has geese carrying a moose! What the heck is that suppose to mean? Aren’t you suppose to attack your opposition with your 404? Bad web from our nation’s leaders!

Day 14 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Goodlife gym boasts using weight machines 2 to 3 times a week will see results fast . According to the sign I read, it’s as easy as 1-2-3′. I wonder what they mean by ‘fast’ results. I have been going for about 10 years and I have not seem any results, not unless you count the bulge around my waste!

Day 15 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – before moving to Ottawa, work days on Fridays usually were a bit more relaxed. Not the case since moving here, Fridays are usually the days that everything goes wrong. I have come to accept that as part of my routine and am now use to it. Of course, last week, I took a Friday off and unfortunately, the ripple effects went into Monday. Mondays are bad days at the best of times…and yesterday took the cake. Compound that with an offsite meeting in a remote part of the city and all the key players did not show up! Tuesday is shaping up to be “really good”!

Day 16 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – cruising through the Google Newstand to see what magazines are available (I am a long time Time magazine fan). It costs the same or more to buy the e-versions of magazines!! That includes all the advertisements!!

Day 17 of 100 Days of dissatisfaction – Feds are kicking in 1 Billion dollars to extend the Ottawa LRT system to Bayshore. I guess it won’t be in my lifetime where I see any transit improvements in my west end burrow, so busing in 40 foot tin cans continues. I guess on the bright side, at least all the deviants who ride MY bus and get off at Bayshore will have an alternative way to get home.

Day 18 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – when someone you know from your youth dies too young, it puts life in a different perspective, that it can be easily taken for granted, which I can be guilty of. RIP Lynn Carter (some of my long time friends may remember)

Day 19 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – I declare my vacation week a ‘pantless’ vacation. Day 1, I have no shorts, they are all in the wash! Dilemma!

Day 20 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Starbucks encourages their employees to “get to know you”. Usually, the best these kids can do is to sound cheerful when they take your order. It is very difficult to get to know someone in a 15 second interaction, especially when hungover from the night before. You may get lucky though, and one will use your name at some point during the transaction (usually to write it on a cup).  They are evaluated on it. This morning, as I went through drive through, I was asked “Are you going to play golf?” I said no, then she said, “Oh, you look like a golfer”.  I am now disappointed. I don’t want to look like a golfer. I want to look like a heavy metal rock star. Image ruined!

Day 21 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – missed as I obviously forgot

Day 22 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Our lovely neighbour, who we affectionately call “Angry Dad” has decided to crank his stereo on full blast all afternoon so that his Electro-Dance music could be heard all the way to Montreal.  At least we do not hear him yelling at his kids all afternoon, but I can’t hear myself think and wonder is this normal for most men to listen to this type of music?

Day 23 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Tulo to Toronto? Wow! He is one of my favourite players! That gives me even more reason to follow the Blue Jays. That said, they need starting pitching. Their starters can barely give them 5 innings every night. They already have league lead in offense! They don’t need more to get them to the playoffs!

Day 24 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Moore’s clothing offers many 2 for 1 deals. What they fail to tell you is that it is on their clothes that are double the normal price, so no real savings!

Day 25 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Long and McQuade’s music store have been doing a lot of promoting of a giveaway for a Gibson Signature Alex Lifeson model. It is an 8000$ guitar.  Figured I needed to buy some guitar strings, and wanted to try out some Gibsons and enter the contest. Not only did my local store not participate in this giveaway, they did not have ANY Gibson guitars available for me to noodle around on!  Ended up just buying strings, but not my usual brand. They were much, much more expensive than  I normally pay!

Day 26 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Crave TV looks pretty cool. Has a lot of great HBO/Showtime content. Need to be on Bell to subscribe. That will never happen. Love Internet in Canada!

Day 27 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Went to the Ottawa Valley to peruse the stores.  Barely got a word out of any of the store keepers. Was it my breath, or are they just shy salesmen?

Day 28 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – so looking forward to this Federal election. Thanks Stephen Harper for all that additional time you are giving us to think about who to vote for, it really does not matter. I have never lived in a riding where the vote really matters.  I was raised in a Liberal riding where the vote margin was about 10:1 in favour of the Liberals, I now live in a riding where the vote margin is about 10:1 in favour of the Conservatives.  So does my vote really matter, especially when one can win a majority government without the moral majority of the vote?

Day 29 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – went to take my morning bus, and noticed it was running very late. After 15 minutes, I called OCTranspo to find out what was going on, it is Monday after all. They told me it is an Ontario “civic holiday” Monday and buses are on a Sunday schedule, which means no buses for my route. I work in Gatineau, QUEBEC!!

Day 30 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Kermit and Piggy have broken up…disappointed. Looking forward to seeing their little frigs!


Day 31 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – It’s bad enough that these people knock on my door Saturday mornings, but now I have to see them shoving the Watchtower in my face everyday since early spring at our park and ride. I guess they are getting tired of getting the door slammed in their face all the time! I never see anyone talking to them, which is a bit of a surprise given that we have lots of Mormons in our neighbourhood.


Day 32 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – I chaired a meeting today. This is what one of the participants doodled…was this an artistic interpretation of how he sees me? I guess he did not have a good time ; )


Day 33 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – this is my experience listening to my music on the bus going from Eagleson to Bayshore this morning…like most mornings on the 40′ sardine cans I ride in. Pay attention to gentleman who sneezes next to me (without covering his face mind you). Click link below to live my experience! I sit in the front where it is quieter!

Day 34 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – every time there is a long weekend, the city of Ottawa delays their garbage pickup. For me, that means instead of having garbage picked up on a Friday, it gets picked up on Saturday. That is really annoying. The only day of the week I get out and run around the neighbourhood and I get to: 1. Try not to gag on green bin composting pukey rotting food smells. 2. Inhale bugs that are flying around the green bins. 3. Enjoy the view of garbage cans, green bins, blue boxes that line up the streets. 4. Avoid the many garbage trucks out to collect all this junk, emitting their noxious fumes and loud engine growls. 5. View my neighbhour’s trash spewed all over their lawn cause they put things out a day early and the racoons got at them.

Day 35 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – dryer part broken and needs to be replaced. Repair man came and did an assessment, but did not have the part. Said he will come back today. Only question remains…at what time?  It is now 2 pm


Day 36 of 100 days of dissatisfaction. My Presto Card mysteriously disappeared at work. When I got home, decided to login to the Web site to report my card is lost.  Here is the messaging.  BTW: How can I confirm this 16 digit number if I lost my card!!!

Report Lost PRESTO Card

If the card number below is correct, please click Submit.

To change the card number, please click Previous.

To cancel your report, please click Cancel.

PRESTO Card Number:

Day 37 if 100 days of dissatisfaction – I am sick today and took a sick day from work. The best way for me to feel better is to crawl under a blanket in a quiet environment and rest while not using my brain too much. Unfortunately, for some unknown reason, it sounds like my neighbours are hosting a turkey convention (at least that is what it sounds like from my indoor perspective given the pitch, the speed, number of people, talking outside). Also, there is no one here to rub my tummy!

Day 38 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – I just heard that this year, I get to celebrate my birthday with the international protest against Uber. I guess the Cabbies are going to protest by being late and having their debit machines not working….

Day 39 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Saw woman with T-shirt that says “Normal is Boring”. I like the sentiment, but does she realize that she lives in Kanata?

Day 40 of 100 days of dissatisfaction (for Friday) – took the bus to the Bayshore mall. Seems like they don’t want anyone shopping there. Took me  a half hour to find the entrance way (access to the bus station was blocked). Then went looking around for an hour for a store that has been there for  a while, only to discover it has shut down. To make matters worse, I did go to another store for a purchase only to discover the bank machines are down! Total bust and useless mall. Takes forever to get around, and with the construction, easy to get lost!

Day 41 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – hard to be dissatisfied when you get to celebrate your wifey’s birthday. Had an awesome day with her. When she went to bed, I figured I would settle to watch the football game of Ottawa vs. Calgary, I stopped watching when Ottawa was losing 32-3. Tuned in to see how my Nationals were doing, they were being clobbered 9-3. Then figured I would watch a movie, Lucy. It started really cool….then ended really badly! Went to bed upset

Day 42 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – I am now registered for my email account at work. I have a “2” at the end of my name. Seems like I was not in line to have a “1” or no number at the end of it, so I am third in line for the most coveted bruce.gordon email…I wonder if they will allow duals to the death for it when the guy retires.

Day 43 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – did a blood test, was 10th in line this morning, including a horker in front of me. Nice. Arrived at work for 9:00 for slew of meetings until noon, at lunch break was drawn into another one. Completed my day with a further slew of meetings from 12:30 – 4:30. Info overload, no work done, and voice horse

Day 44 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – in the process of doing student interviews. I like working with students. They bring a much needed pulse to the workplace. This round, though, I there are some candidates who have a hard time answering questions. One, when asked “Have you offered advice to someone” said that he gave relational advice to his friend encouraging him to  break off with his girlfriend (this is an IT job he is applying for). Another, when asked what does he bring to the team says “I get my s-it done”.  Going to be an interesting decision.

Day 45 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – cable TV is sooooo expensive and I don’t really watch it anymore… Except for sports!!! I need my football fix, and NFL on the internet would cost me more than cable !!!!

Day 46 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – DIE YOU LITTLE BASTARDS!!! This fruit fly nonsense never happened before the city introduced green bins to collect compost related waste!


Day 47 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – this is my music geek coming out.  I love music, and enjoy technology and programming. I use to track and share what I listen to. It is fun for me to see my listening habits, which bands I gravitate too, as well as the ones of my friends. To submit this info, you use a tool calls a “scrobbler”. While you play your songs, the tool scrobbles what you listen to to their site. This week, they posted a new Web site and the scrobbling stopped working. Seems like the tool can only scrobble about 10 songs at a shot, so lots of info missing. Since my “inner geek” did not want to lose stats for the week, I programmed updates for the missing song data. I would like to say time well spent, but really…not really.  BTW: Here is my profile. Sort of fun (my last 7 days listening is not really a reflection of all time listening…see it and it will make sense)

Day 48 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – I have a doctor’s appointment at. 740pm on my anniversary, ‘great ‘ way to celebrate. This should be a decent length wait tonight. Only Methuselah is in line ahead of me. Hope he only has a cold. BTW only been here 30 minutes so far, and no line movement

Day 48 of 100 days of dissatisfaction (cont) – doctor only 45 minutes late so far, Methuselah seeing him now. Wonder if I have enough battery power in my BlackBerry to last this wait.

Day 49 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – before I saw the doctor yesterday, went to refill a prescription at a pharmacy. Doctor said I had to up the dosage, which required a new pill. Went back to pharmacy today. Waited in line to drop off my prescription. One guy ahead of me. He took 15 minutes explaining his life story about something or other to the technician. I dropped off my prescription in 30 seconds FLAT. Waited 40 minutes. Returned in line with one person ahead of me who had a problem paying with his credit card. Resolved in about 10 minutes. Then he was asking technician insurance plan questions, another 10 minutes. Finally he was moved to the side to address his billing issues and some pharmacy questions. Over an hour to pick up a $3 prescription. Evening a bust

Day 50 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – realized I got to renew my car license sticker AND it seems that I have to get the car emissions tested for this wonderful government cash grab Drive Clean program. Seems like my car needs it, even though it is still pretty new, but old clunkers that are pre-1988 are exempt.

Day 51 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – I have to do “online” training. Very basic stuff. The way the course is set up, I spend more time clicking than reading. Further, the questions I have to answer are really common sense and could have been done up front to save time. Two hours of my life I will not get back and I how have a sore wrist.

Day 52 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – For some reason, today after sending a lengthy email with a lot of attachments to HR administration, in different formats, I totally lost it when I received a reply requesting that I combine all 12 attachments into a single document in order for my request to be processed.

Day 53 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – slight twist on today’s post. Trying to look at the glass a half full today. Please post why you think Kanata is a great place to live and what makes it a unique and distinct city.

Day 54 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – blueberries are good, but they are no substitute for strawberries, especially if you want strawberries in a peanut butter and strawberry smoothie. Just does not work!

Day 55 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Ever do PC points for groceries? I have a card. This evening while carting around the store, I hear over the intercom an ad reminding people to ‘reload’ their cards on the internet for all the feature products they are offering points on. The ad featured a a very happy woman who reloaded her card and was excited to by Joe Fresh jeans (no idea why Joe Fresh jeans would cause such a thrill), the unhappy woman just bought groceries at very bad prices. I do faithfully load up my card. At the check out, I had 18$ in the bank and I did not earn any points in the store tonight Could not cash it in either. You need at least 20. Fine. Go home, and what is awaiting me in my email box? An offer to reload my card. I proceed. What did I see? All the groceries I just bought were on special for point collectors. I got none. No Joe Fresh Jeans for me, I guess (the message was sent after I bought the groceries).

Day 56 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – They say exercise is good for you. I get up each morning at around 5:15 to hit the gym. I feel alive. I feel energized, then I hit wall at 9:00 am. Around the time I get to work

Day 57 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Not at ACDC concert tonight (maybe only one in city not there)…only thing on TV is Big Brother.

Day 58 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – wifey prevented me from being dissatisfied! And vacation starts for a week!

Day 59 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – just watched episode 6 of Daredevil on Netflix. Everyone says its amazing, but it seems so slow so far! Figured I would watch an ‘upbeat’ episode of the American version of the Office after, something from season 6, and it was painful (in fact, everything after season 4 is an act of self torture!)

Double counted day 59 Day 59 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – I am tired of the house next door being all fenced up all the way around. With all the additional traffic of onlookers coming around, and the number of people asking me “what happened here” and “did you know about this”, I am considering either : 1 writing a book explaining the situation and selling my rights to the story to the highest bidder 2. offering guided doors around the house for 5$/pop. 3. Selling I survived my neighbour’s hemp garden T-shirts on ebay.
BTW: It is now for sale…a handyman’s dream! The funny thing, they are undercutting an identical house next door by about 50K
Grow op listing
next to door to grow op (they are immaculate)
Day 60 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I like taking the train. On a whim, looked up train rides to Halifax. Return economy is about $400. The quote said that an upgrade to sleeping quarters may be cheeper than I expect, so I had a look at the prices. Was $1300 one way. That is 2 return flights!
Day 61 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – a few years ago, I got a Visa card with an improved chip security. I have to key in a PIN to make a purchase. Now, that ‘improved’ security seems lost as I can now tap the card to make a purchase. In fact, I noticed today that you don’t have to tap, my card just has to be in the vicinity of a machine to make a purchase! Wonder if I will be buying other people’s groceries in the near future!

Day 62 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – British Boy Band One Direction played Ottawa last night. I am not dissatisfied missing them. What astonishes me is that they are playing Ottawa for TWO nights! That must mean that they are playing cities like Montreal for two WEEKS! And they are selling out! Have you ever listened to them? Guarantee that no one will remember there songs in 2 years. Side note: I am dissatisfied bands like ACDC play only one night. I guess that means that, like their music, tickets to their shows ultimately have more value.

 Day 63 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I respect keeping kids safe, especially when they come off the school buses after a long hard day at school. I was driving down our road, and in the opposite direction, about 200 yards from me, a school bus turns ON his flashing red lights while still driving. I have no idea when or where he is going to stop, so I proceed to stop immediately. He zooms by me and stops a bus length behind me and lets off his kids (he was flying down the road). He made me break the law! BTW: This is not the first time this has happened with aggressive school bus drivers. They should get 9 demerits for flashing red lights while driving!

Side note, this was at 2:35…since when do kids get out of school so early!! Don’t they start at 11?


Day 64 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Those of you who know me well understand that NFL football is my vice. That said, the NFL’s popularity is sky rocketing and it is enjoying record revenues, all this despite players who murder, beat their spouses, take illegal substance etc. Not to be outdone, the New England Patriots are a skilled football team who always try to find ways of winning “off the field”. They have been caught illegally videoing other teams practices. They deflated footballs to give them an advantage. They poach players from other team’s practice squads to get the scoop on their opponents. I watched the Pats play the Steelers Thursday night, and there was discussion of problems with headsets that the coaches use to communicate during the game. Mike Tomlin, the Steelers head coach, who is a man IMO of integrity reported the problem during the game. This post was on the Steelers website this morning, which represents the dissatisfaction of an organization. When will the NFL learn that this Patriots team always will find a way to cheat and should be banned from the sport. (BTW: the fact that I am a Miami Dolphins fan has nothing to do with this post!)
Day 65 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I did two day 59s, so I obviously cannot count.
Day 66 of 100 days of Dissatisfaction – typical of the neighbourhood I live in. The area beyond the hedge in my back yard is public property owned by hydro. I mow my section as I often leave my backyard by the gate. It not my responsibility, but I do it just keep the area neat. Some other neighbours do the same. While mowing it, a man wearing a wife beater and a look that reminded me of a balding Mr. Tudball (Tim Conway’s character in the Mrs. Whiggins’ sketches on the Carol Burnett show) approaches me. I have never met this man before. He does not introduce himself (typical) and asked in an angry tone if I knew the neighbour (living to the right of the picture). I said yes,they are very nice people. He goes on to tell me this long sad story of how he was getting fed up of seeing the tall grass behind their house and was worried about bugs, so he has been mowing it all summer…but he vowed to me that he was no longer doing it! Honestly, I don’t care and I really do not know what he wanted of me except to tell me he is not mowing the neighbours public property. If this was really an issue for him, would it have been more productive to go around the block and ring the doorbell of my neighbour to discuss it? Was he hoping I would deliver his message? Man up dude. BTW: I do not know where this guy lives, never mind not knowing his name, and I really could not keep a straight face through this conversation!
Day 67 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – after much hype, I am now on Outlook and my new work email address is now in place.  The migration went really well, but for some reason, I have over 700 email to read today, which is a little bit more than the average.  To compound things, my friendly colleagues replied to me twice for every message I sent, just to keep my inbox well sated!
Day 68 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – It is my birthday, and yes I had a great time celebrating with cake, wifey , and Iron Maiden. Funny thing, only had 5 (out of 180) friends wish me a Happy Birthday on Facebook. Even for me and my miserable ways, that is low. Ends up my security settings were reset (not by me) to mark my b-day as private. So, to the 2 who remembered my day, bless you! For the 4 who wished me a happy birthday without prompting, but found out through my timeline, bless you! For the remainder of the 175 that would have dropped me a warm personal note if reminded, bless you too! And for those that would not have bothered typing “happy birthday” even with a FB reminder, oh what the heck ,many blessings on you as well! ; )
Day 69 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Last year, colleagues at work somehow figured out that it was my birthday. I arrived at work and three people arrived at my desk to wish me happy birthday…only to immediately tell me that all our web servers were down and there is a crisis to deal with. This year, no one new my birthday yesterday, so the day went well. The day after my birthday, one colleague remembered and wish me a belated birthday. Shortly thereafter, had to manage more server issues!
Day 70 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I am a public servant. I have to remain neutral of my political opinions online or anywhere. That is hard when I see stupid and meaningless political memes going around, especially of parties I don’t support. But you know what? After watching last night’s debate, I can safely say, it is very easy to be neutral!
Day 71 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Facebook is working on a dislike button. The idea is to use it to empathize with a post. For example, it is a bit odd to “like” a post where someone announces the death of a loved one. Flip side, I  wonder how many people will get unfriended because of this feature.
One thing for sure, I am glad it is not available during my days of dissatisfaction!

Day 72 of 10 Days of Dissatisfaction – There are many reasons why I do not subscribe to NFL Sunday Ticket to see all the football games. Today’s NFL experience whacks it out of the park for dissatisfaction:

1. Repeated commercials (and there are many of them, expected and annoying).
2. Repeated commercials taunts me with Dairy Queen Bakes (I LOVE ICE CREAM and APPLE PIE, but I am on a gluten and dairy free diet)
3. To watch the dolphins, I have to watch online in the format below (very painful with all the play stoppage for commercials)|
4. Dolphins lose in typical Fish style. A meltdown at the end of the game, against a very very weak team.

Same old Dolphins. Same ulcer feeling in my gut. Bright side, Dallas’ hope for a perfect season is shot (Romo and Bryant injured, team lead by Branden Weeden…the name says it all)

Day 73 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – what is this world coming to? Got off the bus to see a little girl (maybe 8 years old), wearing ballet slippers, white stockings and a tutu walking down the street removing the signs of a prominent political candidate in our community. She removed 4, then bolted back to her house where I saw her get into a pickup truck (I guess to dance class). Did her dad tell her to do that act of vandalism? Did it matter if it was for a party I don’t support?
Day 75 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – My wifey loves(d) cats. I bought what I thought was an excellent Christimas gift last year, a 365 day cat calendar. It seemed like a good idea at the time, but the photographer does not have a clue how to take pictures of cats. 95% of the photos are of cats that look like they were the bi-product of a taxidermy experiment that went wrong (similar spaced out expressionless shots like the first one in the series). There have been two exceptions posted below. btw these are the only ones that have had a different “look” all year, including today’s
Day 76 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – LOVE self checkout at the grocery store. There is always someone having difficulty paying for the purchase, or someone who insists on going through these lines with 10 million items (usually fruits and veg, which they do not know the codes for) accompanied by screaming children, or someone who sorts through a huge coupon book for each item, so needs to see the attendant for each item being bought. To make matters worse, I usually want to get through this process as fast as possible, and to have a friendly computer say “please put your item in the bag” even when I have done so, every time I scan something, or ask me “how many bags I would like to purchase” when I really don’t want to contribute to the grocery store’s overly inflated profits by buying a 5 cent bag that costs 5 cents for a 1000 can put me over the edge! I think I should be paid the same as a cashier, since I am doing their job. But I don’t even get a discount!
Day 77 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction. Tomorrow is garbage day. I have often wondered why taking out the trash is traditionally the ‘man’s’ job.
Day 78 of 100 days of dissatisfaction – Sign of my age. One of the most memorable trips wifey and I went on was to Arizona, about 15 years ago.  We went to a mini-Las Vegas on the border of Arizona and Nevada. They film all the Vegas films there, and fro $50 each, we had travel from Scotsdale, Hotel at the Flamingo Hilton, and free food for two nights. I often talk about this small town to friends. This week, I was telling someone about it, and completely forgot the name of the city. It took me five days and I finally remember after intense concentration and discussion with Wifey (who forgot too!). It is called Laughlin, Nevada.
Day 79 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – At the post office, I was served by two young women with zero personality (normal). While doing my business, I hear two employees talking behind me very loudly. One, at the top of his lungs screams with a comedic tone “You hear about Alex? He ripped his pants!” Then I hear another voice say “No way! That is the third time he did it” Laughter ensued. I tried to ignore it, and contain myself, but I felt a tear role down my cheek. Facing me, two stone expressionless faces. Not even flinching. They barely say good bye. I turn to leave and saw no one behind me. Did I imagine it all? Alex obviously needs to upgrade his pants size, at least for the sake of his customers. Hope he wasn’t a plumber…it is bad enough that they always have their Crack showing
Day 80 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – sick today. Had to sleep in the afternoon, but that’s ok, figured I would catch the tale end of some football games. There were none to choose from. The most exciting game was a fieldgoal barn burner between the Steelers and the Rams (12-6). I was hopeful the Dolphins game would be a little more interesting. Ends up this team, with all the hype and promise there was during the preseason, looks even WORSE than last year. Boring one sided thrashing by Buffalo. Lackluster lethargic Dolphins team. Leaving my logo as is on Facebook until the team fires the coach.
Adding to my frustration, the Washington Nationals were officially eliminated from postseason base ball last night. I follow them, despite leaving Montreal. Seems like they are living up the Montreal Expos tradition of choking when it matters towards the end of the season.
 Day 81 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I was reminded (via email) that my Apple Music subscription is about to expire.  I signed up with for a three month trial to check out their collection since I listen to most of my tunes on my iPod touch and my Apple TV. It makes sense  (I love my Google All Play music btw!).   I was also lured in with the promise that there will be apps available for Android and will be available on Apple TV. When I signed up, I saw some interesting play lists in iTunes, so I figured I would put them on my iPod Touch to listen to on my rides into work. Got a message saying that my iPod is not supported for Apple Music. That’s ok, it is a few years old, so I just assumed my iPod was obsolete.  A month into my trial, wifey got me a slick iPod Nano. I thought, great! I can listen to Apple Music on it (it is new after all). Got the same message. Yesterday, I looked up on the Google Store for Apple Music, it was not there. I figured maybe I can listen to it on Apple TV. Unable to play it on that.  Seems like Apple have not released the Android App or patch for Apple TV yet despite what was advertised.  Only way I can listen to Apple Music is by sitting in front of my computer. BAH!
Day 82 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I am all for rain. I am also for dressing up to go the office. What I am not for is riding on cram packed, 40 foot bus, feeling crushed in like a pack of sardines, with the heat on full blast (when it is 19 degrees outside). Bus feels like an amazon jungle You can see the steam rise on the windows. I leave the bus wet, damp, and my clothes smell strong of dryer sheets for some reason. I am wetter than when I walk out of the shower. Which raises the point. Why do I bother showering?
Day 83 of 100 Days of Satisfaction – Have you ever worked on a project that seems to have no end, no planning, changing direction, fixed deadlines, and the whole thing may be canned in the near future? This seems to be a recurring theme in my professional life. Lucky for me, I am flexible. I am sure all those that have worked with me (either professionally, socially, or voluntarily) in the past can vouch for that! And no, I don’t mean flexible as in yoga. I have the suppleness of a telephone pole. : )

Day 84 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Sad day (again) in the US. Maybe this is crazy, but I think the right to own a gun is trumped by the right not to be shot by one; and maybe I am dreaming in technicolor, but I wish mental health care was as easy to get as, say, a gun.

To quote John Oliver from the Daily Show “One failed attempt at a shoe bomb and we all take off our shoes at the airport. Thirty-one school shootings since Columbine and no change in our regulation of guns.”

Day 85 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I am always amazed at the amount of profanity out there and how the art of oral communication is lost. When I was young, I was known to drop an f-bomb or two. Even sometimes now, I do as well. I also understand that some words are not as offensive as they were a few decades ago. When Rhett Butler said “Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn” in Gone with the Wind (1939), that stunned audiences. Now, we don’t blink an eye when someone swears. For some it denotes toughness and intimidates. Others, it is used for humour and shock. And yet others, it is a natural and cultural expression – as I heard today, for the first time today, while waiting for the bus, an entire sentence comprising (for the most part) 1 colourful word used as a noun, verb, and adjective. The only other words in the sentence were “You can” and I think a “the”. Hate to hear how they order a full seven course meal at a restaurant, or to try to communicate technical requirements for a new complex software.
Day 86 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Beautiful weekend day in the suburbs. Odd thing is, everyone is out driving around doing whatever it is the denizen do. There is NOBODY walking, biking or enjoying the sunshine, just zooming around in their cars, rushing to the grocery store to get that 2 for 1 deal on canned tomatoes, and they are all sold out.  Suburb roads are about the equivalent of driving on the Queensway during rush hour.
Day 87 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Saw someone I knew  at the grocery store.  Looked him straight in the eye and said hello, only to be promptly ignored.  I have found that in Ottawa, saying hello is not something people do, unless you have some sort of signed contract in blood permitting that social exchange.  In fact, people “may” talk to you after seeing your face regularly for two years in a common community, like your office.  And you wonder why Ashley Madison is so popular for Ottawans.

Day 88 or 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Wifey was kind enough to buy me an Apple Gift Card for my birthday. It seems, that an Apple Gift Card cannot buy music from iTunes. It can only be used for hardware or accessories from the Apple store. I just bought a computer and a Nano. So I figured I would ask Apple if I could exchange it for an iTunes card (after reading on their sight, it was clear that there are two types of cards). Heck, I was thinking I could even BUY an iTunes card with my gift card. Here is their no brainer reply, which was very helpful and I feel like I have been “pointed in the right direction”.

Hi Bruce,

Greetings! This is Kathrinna, your iTunes Store Advisor. Thanks for contacting us.

I understand that you’d like to use your Apple Gift Card on iTunes Store. I know how important for you to redeem your gift card. Rest assured that I will point you to the right direction to have your issue addressed.

Bruce, I’d like to share that, Apple Store Gift Cards can be used to purchase Apple hardware and accessories at any Apple Retail Store or

On the other hand, iTunes Gift Cards can be used for music, movies, TV shows, apps, and books. iTunes Gift Cards can’t be used at an Apple Retail Store or for purchases from Apple Store Gift Cards can’t be used on the iTunes Store.

For more information about gift cards, see this page:

Also, I’d like to clarify that, our gift card exchange program has been suspended and it is uncertain as to when or if the program will be started again.

Since this was purchased by your wife, I recommend that you tell her about this and try to get in touch with the customer service where she purchased the gift card to see whether it could be exchanged on their end or could refunded.

I hope I was able to clear things out and thank you for understanding. Take care!



Day 89 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction  We have neighbours across a yard we call “crazy cat people”. They always seem to have five cats climbing running around their yard, and they seem to be interchangeable….there is a new cat every year. I love cats, but because we are the only house with a hedge (no fence), the cats use our backyard as a convenient expressway to the front of our house, where they use our yard as a form of public litter box.
Today, I was greeted by this pathetic creature.  Looks like it wants a snack.

Day 90 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – The world of modern technology. I have a tablet, an ipod Touch, a chromebook, and a BlackBerry. It seems that I spend most of my life “recharging” devices and managing how I go about recharging them. Tonight is grand. All my devices need to be recharged. I have more devices to recharge than available plugs in my room! So for tonight, in absence of real cool devices, I am posting my dissatisfaction “old school”, from behind computer!

Day 91 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – yes, another grocery store adventure. You may sense there is a bit of a theme here, especially with regard to how much I detest grocery shopping!

Tonight’s episode featured a long lineup at checkout. In the spot in front of me, a six year old child had his arms straight out in front of him, walking in circles like he was Frankenstein, bumping into everything. He repeated (with slight accent) “I am a zombie, I am a zombie” over, and over, and over, and over again, with the odd grr thrown in.

I was tempted to feed him some brains just to get him to stop this zombie act and to try to convince him to do something different, like pretending to be a rock. But then, I felt sorry for him, as most adults in this city are zombies, and usually don’t turn into them until they are well into their twenties, or start work in the public service.

Six is WAY to young for anyone to catch this sickness.

Day 92 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – yes this is an early morning edition, but my day started with a bang. For years, we receive flyers and papers delivered to our home. We get so many, the deliverers don’t really have enough place to put them. They do their best to cram them in our mailbox (they have damaged a few along the way), or leave them on the ground to be blown around by the wind on our yard or to be soaked by the rain and snow. I have placed signs “NO FLYERS”, but it seems that only illiterates deliver flyers. And I kid you not, there is a LOT. Each grocery store produces a Sunday paper each week. We have the local newspaper. We get little bags filled with more paper. During the holidays, every store has one. I guess I should not complain, they do deliver the day before garbage pickup day.

As a last ditch passive aggressive effort (after all, the bleeding obvious of my not wanting them was not enough), I placed my recycling bin under my mailbox, with the hope the message would sink in and they would place the flyers in the bin. Well, that did not work.

BTW: yes, it is quite dark at 6:45 am

Footnote: the bin does look full, that is because I had to pick up a huge pile of paper on my step, which I proceeded to slam in the bin before deciding to take a photo.

Footnote2: The small sign on the door to the right says “No solicitors”, which seems another occupation where illiteracy is a career asset.


Day 93 of 100 Days of Disaatisfaction – in a burst of nostalgia, tonight I decided to watch old wrestling videos of matches I liked as a kid on youtube. I was struggling to get youtube working on my iPod Touch 4G, but finally got to watch some vids. I was saddened by the realization that wrestling is fake…
BTW, my thimbs are way to big to type on my ipod. It took me 20 minutes to do this post!
Day 94 of 1000 Days of Dissatisfaction – Wifey reliving her childhood by watching Jem and the Holograms.  If you have never watched this 80s tripe, it is about a group of helium inhaling, Brittney Spears wanna-bes who get magical powers to give them the ability to lip synch almost perfectly, while trying to play air guitar. The music, the stage production, and the marketing is done by a super computer called Synergy. Their enemy, a real band that is marginalized by the industry, called the Misfits, plays music that sounds almost identical to the Holograms. Despite the Misfits  hard work, they are constantly ripped off by Synergy and the Holograms, forcing them to busking on the streets.
Here is a sample of this show. Judge for yourself
I am looking forward to Jem doing a cross over with GI Joe’s Black Metal artist -Golobulus
Day 95 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Ever binge watch a TV show?  This is a day off for us, so we figured we would watch “How to Get Away with Murder”.  It is on Rogers on Demand. When we tried to access the On Demand channel, the PVR said that the channel was “undefined”, so it took us about an hour to resolve our technical issues.  Once done, we sat to watch the show.  I think this is an excellent show and worth watching. However, is it just me, or are they making TV shows drag out much longer than they have to? There are many “filler” scenes set to music, granted, they are sex scenes, so music is appropriate, though flanging funk would have been better than melancholy indie. I guess it would be hard to have meaningful dialogue in them (unless you are Game of Thrones, in which case a whole story is told by a character while lesbians demonstrate their creativity in a brothel…probably why people don’t know what is going on the show). Ever watch the Office? All 9 seasons x 26 episodes per season. I am sure there were a few episodes the writers were “stretching it” a bit. Or how about that classic Breaking Bad fly in the laboratory episode?  Excellent fodder to avoid advancing the plot when you know you have too many episodes to write. Ya, there are still many good TV shows out there, but I guess concept of “mini series” where there is a logical start and end just does not work anymore.

Day 96 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – off sick from work and noticing that kids are coming home from school before 2:30 pm! They are now playing in the streets making a racket – my peace ruined. Obviously they do not study after school, so how many hours do they actually sit in a classroom each day? I recall coming home after five from school, and that was on days when I did not have any sport team practices! My next question, if their school hours are shorter, why bother sending them to school in the first place? Can they not do stuff online with their Playstations?


Day 97 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – got a promo in the mail. I get a 10$ bonus by joining Costco. Ever shop at Costco? You can get great deals, but is 10 dollars enough incentive to lure new members? One item at Costco is about $100 dollars, so 10% on one purchase not too bad, but what if you get 8 items? BTW I think membership is still about 50$, so this bonus won’t even go towards a purchase!

Day 98 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – Can’t wait until my first day off from my Days of Dissatisfaction. Why? It is the election night. Why should that matter? Cause after the last 100 days, our phone has been called at least 5 times a day with one political party or other asking for their support (going as late as 9:15 pm), and our doorbell rung every day with people who ignore our “no soliciting” sign to tell us how great the Natural Law Party is (or equivalent). I am getting tired of politics. It is the reason why I moved from Quebec to Ottawa.


Day 99 of 100 Days of Dissatisfaction – I have been playing guitar on and off for about the last 30 years. I seek inspiration by reading lots of articles about other musicians, and watch youtube videos of axemen wielding creative renditions of popular songs. Lately I have seen two “inspirational” posts on my timeline (found below).

The first is of an 11 year old playing Dream Theater, and it seems she has had this talent since she was 8. FYI For those of you who do not know, John Petrucci (guitarist of Dream Theater), is one of those guitarists who are “untouchable” by us mere mortals who are hacking away on the guitar.

The other, is of an 81 year old man who can WOW the crap out of anyone.

For me, the message is clear, according to Facebook. Petrucci is easy enough for an 11 year old to play (I am now disillusioned as I cannot even play Neil Young songs), or it will take me another 34 years to get to the level of play of the 81 year old!

Quitting guitar! ; )


Hard to believe, that the 100 day journey is ending.  When I started, I was not sure that I could get past 20 days, but finding things to be dissatisfied about was pretty easy, especially in this city, which, to quote the Joker from Batman, needs an enema. When one looks for it, there is a lot of ripe material to draw from. What have we learned from this journey:

  • OC Transpo buses are designed for discomfort and are inconveniently scheduled; all intentional to discourage ridership and encourage overall traffic congestion. Ottawa is third worse in Canada btw.
  • driving in Ottawa, especially rush hours on the Queensway, are lots of fun if you enjoy listening to commercials on the radio
  • public servants in Gatineau are not entitled to any fine dining. Tim Horton’s is the best that they can get, second to Couche Tard hot dogs and burritos
  • people in this city are natural targets – either they are just plain too serious, or express themselves so poorly due to an inherent passive aggressive nature that prevails. Sarcasm is dangerous.
  • Technology, though useful, requires constant attention, and takes us away from the things we should be doing

The funny thing, I did not go down the religion stream. I figured I ranted for over a year about my dissatisfaction with religion, so no need for a repeat. And for most people, even the mention of the word religion creates a bad sense of gastro-indegestion. Religion, though, is SUCH an easy target, especially in religions that preach “love thy neighbour” and go about hating their God’s creation, all in the name of religious liberty. For a group of people who claim to drink from the “well of life”, one  would expect deep satisfaction. In reality, as a body, they are depressed and are really dissatisfied, a result of setting a moral bar impossibly high and living in constant fear (also a contradiction).  This is really prevalent in the States where religion and capitalism are an unholy union.

Despite my grumpy posts, I have learned that there is much in life that does satisfy.  With the twist of irony, it is easy to see it when you look at the negative with a humorous twist. Good community is what  ultimately satisfies, especially with the all the quirkiness of what is all around you and being able to laugh at the things that annoy you .

Thanks all for being friends, being a part of my community, and sharing this journey with me.

Hope you had as much fun as I did!

Don’t be a stranger, keep in touch ; )

Bye for now